By Footey

56. have you ever stopped and noticed that when people are fixin to tell you stuff they are nervous about ... they start with ..."i don't know how to tell you this,but....."

57. now do you feel better to get that off your chest...hmmm pondering why people say that phrase.....to me it seemed like it would be off your mind...rather than your chest....of course not really off your mind b/c after it comes out...you still think about it....

58. how does one go about discussing the topic at hand?....can topics be held in one's hand?

59. on the other hand....assuming that the first topic is the right hand...can we assume that the other hand is the wrong hand...

60. just how did the phrase "that was the last straw" get started.....did some poor little kid get beat up in school after taking the last straw atlunch?

61. why are clouds that are full of rain turn grey?

62. how does one kill time?

63. while watching springer i pondered the following things about the abundance of censor bleeps....
       a) kinda sounds like....this is a test...this is a test of the white trash
           broadcast system
       b) are the censor's sending morse code to aliens
       c) did you ever notice that cycle of long segments of bleeps followed by
           one word and some more bleeps....kinda sounds the same as when you
           flip through stations pretty fast with the remote

64. if shooting a three pointer in basketball is known as "shooting one from downtown" then is the basket in the suburbs?

65. is it politically correct to say that someone is a "straight A student" ifthat person happens to be gay?

66. if time is money and the love of money is the root of all evil....then isthe love of time also evil?

67. also seeing as time is money, and there is a time for everything under the sun....then is there money for everything under the sun?

68. seeing as insurance companies will not pay for treatment unless they think it as medically necessary..........and seeing as insurance companiesare debating over whether or not they will pay for viagra and if they dohow many will they pay for......does this mean that insurance companiesare debating on whether sex is medically necessary and if so... how manytimes a week is it necessary?

69. if image is nothing...how come sprit uses nba stars to promote the product?

70. pondering what it would sound like if puff daddy used some original music....

71. how many roads must a chicken cross before they call him a chicken?

72. which came first...the cadburry egg or the cadburry bunny?

73. ever notice how the "i wanna be like mike" song has lyrics that go ...... "sometimes i dream that he is me".......so actually that part of the songmeans they want mike to be like them rather than them being like mike

74. has bob costas ever had any unbiased broadcasts?

75. why are vampires believed to be bats....would it not make more sense if vampires were mosquitoes?

76. is nba breaking anti-trust laws by using the middle of sports broadcaststo promote and further it's position in primitive tv shows

77. how come baldness tends to be bilateral....meaning your bald places are pretty well the same on both sides

78. how come radio stations say they have 20 (or some other number) song blocks with no commercial interuption......yet the interrupt the blockto say they play 20 songs in a row

79. what if the radio station says the will pay money to the person who calls in first when the break the block......can i call in and claim that theyhad a commercial for themselves (self promotion of the music block) andwin the money

80. lets see....how about after the nba lockout we compose a team made
up of anthony mason (child endangerment), allen iverson (marijuana
possession), juwan howard (accused of sexual assault), charles oakley
(accused of battery), charles barkely (throwing guy through club
window), and this team couldn't be complete without latrell sprewell
(coach choking....and 100 mph crashes on the freeway)....for a coach...
maybe karem for his brief altercation with a guy in a parking lot a few
years back....... while i'm at it...we will have the referees that have been
 caught on tax fraud and put marv albert as commentator....YES!!! ALL
THIS MUST GIVE NEW MEANING TO THE ILLEGAL DEFENSE
CALL!!!!!!!!

81. ok, while i'm on the topic of nba...who would win in a 1 on 1 game
between bob costas and david stern..........both claim to know a lot about
basketball, but i doubt they could play the game

82. why do people say they are as sick as a dog?........what if your dog is
in good health?

83. are dogs brownnosers?.......seeing as they sniff at everyone's butts

84. if men are from mars, and women from venus.......what does this say
about intelligent life on other planets....and on earth for that matter?

85. do doctors take a course in medical school teaching them how to
scribble?.... or is there something about medical school that reverts them
to their childhood?

86. ok, time to consider a weird psychological therory.......it's called
S.P.A.M. (no not the meat product nor the kind we get in our inboxes)...it
stands for Subliminal Psychodynamic Activation Method........basicly the
theory deals with a given stimulus can subconsciously evoke feelings that
lead to our performance....the theory was tested on math students in
israel.....before they took a test...some where shown a phrase that says
"mommy and i are one"...and the ones that were shown this did better on
the exam......the theory explains
this as the phrase "mommy and i are one" subconsciously made the
students feel protected and nurtured, thus reducing stress and allowing
them to perform better.........now i had to explain all of that for the
following:

       this leaves me with two ponderings.....
       a) just why would mommy and i be one?
       b) couple "mommy and i are one" with freud's oedipus complex 
         (a period in which freud said young boys want to kill their father
         and have sex with their mother).......would this mean that freud 
         wanted to have sex with himself and kill himself?

87. i present to you two of larry's ponderings and my combination of the
two:.....
"21. Why do deer like to stare at headlights?"
"187  Is it instinctual for people to have a blank stare when they are in
unfamiliar territory?"........now does this mean deer find themselves in
unfamiliar territory when they stare at headlights?

88. is it politically correct to have signs that say "men working"?

89. why do people think nose rings are a rebellious fad of this
generation......i refer you to genesis 24...pay close attention to verses
22,30 and 47....in a nutshell abraham sent a servant to find a wife for his
son isaac...this servant prayed for God to reveal the right woman to
him...this right woman was rebekah....when the servant approached
rebekah he presented her with a "gold nose ring weighing a beka(1/5
ounce)" and two bracelets.....in verse 30 we learn that rebekah in fact
wore this jewelry

90. a lot of people have been puzzled over the fact the bible tells us God
created us in his image male and female......often leaving one to wonder
what is God's image and does he look like us or what?........let us also
consider the trinity....God is father, son, and holy spirit......given this all i
am pondering....father and son...signifying God came in earthly
form as Jesus, thus having a body like us (thus in his image), and in both
the case of Jesus and us we see God as father (thus in our earthly body
and Jesus's earthly body..God is father)....and we possess a spirit our soul(likewise we are made in the image of God in the fact he is the holy
spirit)

91. final jeopardy in the category of names....and the answer is tv trivia game show host who got their show b/c their last name has a trivial ringthat sounds like tivek....what is alex trebek?

92. on that note, i'm pondering if that is alex's real name or did sony tv make him change his name for the show

93. why do people say that i have a good head on my shoulders? last time i looked my head was between my shoulders....not on them

94. how come people automatically assume the fetal position when the are hurt really badly?

95. what has been the effect of el nino on the climate of opinion?

96. how come we pay for so much air in a bad of potato chips? they claim it is due to settling after packaging, so why don't they make the machineshake the bag for a few sec.'s and then add some more chips?

97. what would be the outcome if a potato chip company started a soft drink company? would they wait for the fizz to settle and add more colaor would they fill it up till it fizzed over and ship a half empty 2 liter?

98. if the root word of "auto" means self or own.......and the suffix "opsy" means view of........don't you think they misnamed the procedure called "autopsy"?....kinda hard to look at yourself when your dead, you know....

99. speaking of the above....there is a tendency where if a word is used wrong long enough and by enough people...the word becomes the rightand accepted for the meaning even though it is technically wrong......doesthis mean if two wrongs are done long enough and by enough people theythen will become right?

100. do flashing police lights pose a health threat to seizure prone drivers?

101. would you fail a relaxation class if you stressed yourself out studyingfor the test?

102. ever notice what they call what professionals (doctors, lawyers, physical therapist, etc.) do.....they call it practice......sorta makes mewonder when they will play a real game....i mean, imagine if youwill....you go into the hospital to get a bypass or something....should thisbe real or practice?

103. who is cliff and why does he have so many notes?

104. will someone please explain the following link.......i came across it one day while surfing the net, and seeing as it may be the last remainingwebpage...i saved it

105. came across this headline while reading the Saturday July 11, 1998 edition of The Tennessean.....you would think the writers at the APwould realize that the parents of preschoolers are the ones that are poor....

106. speaking of headlines, here is one i found while looking at the university of tennessee's webpage.....click here .......without reading the story, the headline would leave one to think we could stop violence if weall had firearms

107. have you ever noticed how kenny from south park looks like one of those little foldable hairdryers from the side?

108. have you ever noticed how magic johnson's talk show looks like it took over the old set of  arsenio?

109. remember the atari 2600 game space invaders......seeing as the game occurs in space who were the invaders.....us or the aliens?

110. is beauty really in the eye of the beholder?...seeing as our eyes merely provide a structure to let light stimulate receptors that our brainuses to form images.....and seeing as each individual has to make adecision, rather conscious or subconscious as to what beauty is, i wouldsay beauty is in the mind of the beholder...see what i mean?

111. why is it that very rich people are said to be "filthy rich"?.......youwould think with that much money they could at least buy a tub/shower, some soap, and waste a little water

112. does cinnamon gum actually retain its flavor longer than other gum, or do we just not notice the loss of flavor due to the fact it fries out tastebuds?

113. so just who does axl rose call on a phone and talk to in the middle of g-n-r's version of "knockin on heaven's door"?

114. is our national anthem politically correct....."ohh, say can you see"........what about the blind people in america? how does that make them feel?

115. if i am at an intersection and turn left when i meant to turn RIGHT (itook the WRONG turn) and i then proceed to make a u-turn in front of a no u-turn sign (we all know according to the law this is WRONG)......wellonce i pass through the intersection again and i am finally going theRIGHT direction.......does 2 WRONGS equal a RIGHT?

116. which is correct......a u-turn.........or an u-turn?.....last i recall u was a vowel, but i never hear anybody say an u-turn and frankly, it just doesn'tsound right

117. can i be frank with you? who was frank and why did he say whatever was on his mind?

118. how come lois lane couldn't recognize superman's face as that of clark kent's?

119. why do heros wear masks? (i.e..... lone ranger, batman, blank man)

 120. why do people have links pages on their web site.....i mean i just spent several minutes adding more places for you to go to from here....it'skinda like what seinfeld says about men and tv...."men don't care what isone tv, just what else is on tv."....changing that a bit......no one careswhat is on this webpage, just what else is on the web.

121. why is it i have tons of these pondering that i have thought of, that never make it down to a piece of paper or webpage.......i can neverremember them when i go to update, but somehow they come back to me when i'm reminded of something associated with them.

122. this next ponder was brought to you by Clueless .....in response to my pondering about men at work signs she was pondering why they evenhave the men at work signs up, b/c they are wrong........usually no one isworking

123. why does God have such an affinity for making things and providing plans for making things?......(i.e. the world, plants, animals, humans,plans for the arks (Noah's and the ark of the covenant))...... with all thisin mind, it doesn't really surprise me that Jesus was a carpenter by trade.

124. pondering Leviticus 13:40 "when a man has lost his hair and is bald, he is clean." ..... is this why Mr. Clean is bald on the front of the cleaner'sbottle?

125. pondering Exodus 3:8 "so I have come down to rescue them from the hand of the egyptians and to bring them up out of this land into a goodand spacious land, a land flowing with milk and honey - the land of thecanaanites, hittites, amorites, perizzites, hivites, and jebusites."....... is it me or does this verse make you think of cheerio's .... "the taste of nuts and honey ..."

126. you know, you would think since mike brady was an architect that he could have designed and built an additional bathroom on to the house

127. would my neighbors think i was crazy if i astroturfed my back yard? or would they wait to think that when we started having potato sackraces?

128. pondering exodus 30:17-21 and God's relationship with OSHA ... "17Then the LORD said to Moses, 18"Make a bronze basin, with itsbronze stand, for washing. Place it between the Tent of Meeting and the altar, and put water in it. 19Aaron and his sons are to wash their handsand feet with water from it. 20Whenever they enter the Tent of Meeting,they shall wash with water so that they will not die. Also, when theyapproach the altar to minister by presenting an offering made to the LORD by fire, 21they shall wash their hands and feet so that they will notdie. This is to be a lasting ordinance for Aaron and his descendants forthe generations to come."

129. how come phone numbers on tv and movies begin with 555-?

130. have you ever noticed how you can watch a movie that you have not seen in forever and sudenly realize "i didn't know so-n-so was in thismovie" .... b/c since the last time you saw that movie the so-n-so inquestion has been made way famous by some other show or movie ... forexample ..... i watched top gun recently and didn't realize until now thatgoose was played by anthony edwards (dr. mark green on ER) ......speaking of er .... Eriq La Salle (dr. peter benton on ER) was in comingto america .... didn't realize that one until recently when i was flippingthough channels

131. how come dylan on bev. hills 90210 got away with living by himself all the way through high school?

132. why do tv stations think if i'm up at 2:00 am flipping channels, then for some reason i must be in need of one or more of the following things:
(1.) some form of exercise equipment (2.) some form of household device (whether it be some cooking device, vacuum, etc.)( 3.) some wayto make money (4.) some cd collection (5.) a singles/party line to call (6.)a psychic (7.) some program to help me read faster (8.) some way to loseweight (8.) and other misc. useless crap

133. speaking on #3 above ..... if they want give me a program that will make me money and then they tell me the call is free and the informationis free ..... so i'm wondering what part do i pay for? i mean, if you had aprogram to make money, would you then buy an infomercial spot andgive your money making secrets away for free ... i doubt it

134. does the smoke at a concert or club change the acoustic properties of the room? if so, do musicians have more or less trouble setting up thesound system at a smoke free venue?

135. how come their is that correlation between the more one drinks, the more high fives they want from their friends?

136. how come the more one drinks, the louder they talk?

137. for those of you in the nashville area ... pay close attention to radio stations .... spend some time flipping between them and see if you cannotice some marketing tactics ..... here is the rundown of what has takenplace with several stations having some overlap in their play lists and withseveral new stations and format changes ... more and more i'll be listeningto a song on one station and after the song say i start flipping throughstations and bam i land on one of the other stations who just happen to beplaying a couple of songs in a row by the same artist i just got throughlistening to on the last station ..... thus they are trying to draw the listenersof the other stations into listening to their station for a while

138. which wastes more gas, running the air conditioner in the car or the wind drag caused by having the window down?

139. have you ever thought you made up a word and then looked it up and it was actually a word?

140. why does aol pick such weird times on their annoying pop-up windows ....... who cares that i have been on line for 46 minutes, butwhat i want to know is why not 45 minutes?

141. along these same lines .... what's up with those speed limits that are say 14 or 24 in apartment complexes or hotels, etc. (opryland hotel is agood example ... speed limit 24 .... why?)

142. someone explain this, i just flipped on an infomercial aimed at getting some package to show me how to set up my own 1-900 number andmake money off of it .... funny thing is the # they want me to call to getthe stuff is a 1-800 #

143. OU812 (oh, you ate one too) .... just what did we eat that van halen ate?

144. how come they have commercials that say i can't get this product in stores only on tv, but two months later i see it in a store with a stickersaying "as seen on tv"?

145. if i put my two cents in, will inflation cause my opinion to be worth less over time?

146. why is it we always say that we would like nothing more than some time off to lay around and vegetate, but when we get that time offboredom makes us crazy after a few days

147. i happened to pass a psychic place today that had bars on the windows ...... you know, you would think that if they had real psychicabilities they would know when someone was going to break into theirplace .... therefore they wouldn't need the bars

148. no shirt, no shoes, no service ..... does this mean if i come in wearing only a shirt and shoes, with no pants, etc. they would serve me?

149. why do some radio stations that end in .9 on your dial, round there station number up? for example Q108 is actually 107.9 and the old format105.9 used to call itself 106

150. how come no one sells garages in a garage sale?

151. would the line to women's restrooms be half as long if women didn't insist on going to the bathroom in pairs?

152. if there were more hours in the day, would i get more done, or would i just procrastinate more?

153. why are credit cards distinguished as gold cards, platinum cards, etc.?... last time i checked they were plastic

154. funny thing that the white house is white, seeing as white is the symbol for purity

155. a little numerology ...

       40 -- 40 days wandering in the desert; 40 days/nights in the flood
       12 -- 12 tribes of israel; 12 disciples
       7  -- 7 days in the week; 7th day is the sabbath
       6  -- 6 days to create the earth before the one day of rest
       3  -- 3 days between Jesus' death and rise; the trinity
       ok here we go if you can follow it .....
       40 - 3 = 37 (40, 3, and the digits 3 and 7 mentioned above)
       12 + 6 = 18 (12 and 6 mentioned above ... don't really have a significanceto
       18 or digits 1 and 8)
       37 x 18 = 666

156. i talk off the top of my head, funny how i seemed to get my mouthup there, a feat of modern genetics, i presume, had the procedure beeninvented long before, maybe the apple would have hit newton there in hismouth, the gravity of the situation defies the mind

157. i present you with the common phrase "naked as a jay bird" ..... as ifall the rest of the birds wear clothes ....

158. how come sundays are not always sunny?

159. wondering what the implications of raising hell is?  why do peoplesay they raise hell and what exactly is it? how come no one says they lower heaven?

160. the next time your in a public restroom, check to see if the plumbing was Royal made by the sloan valve company (guys this is an easy one,just look down and fwd while standing at the urinal) ... n-e-way, does thisgive the poker term "royal flush" a new meaning

161. and now let us consider some dialog coming straight from e-mail replies between larry and i .... larry>>titles original e-mail lamentations<<.... my reply >>lament- at- ions ....... just breaking it down for ya likesesame street ....... i feel the sorrow of the lonely plus chargedhydrogen<< .... larry replies >>You must have been listening to me talkabout the social polarization of the masses one too many times...<< ....my reply >>if i take a large magnet .... can i affect the social polarizationof the masses?<<

162. ecclesiastes 1:18 "for with much wisdom comes much sorrow; the more knowledge, the more grief." .... does this explain the perception thatblondes have more fun?

163. why is the #13 so unlucky?

164. actual copyright statements from textbooks "this material may not be stored in a retrieval system"..... guess there goes studying for the test,last i checked my brain was a storage and retrieval system so to speak...... while i'm on the subject of speaking ... suppose the teacher readscertain sentences word for word from the book and suppose people aretaping the lecture ... is this copyright infringement?

165. if home is where the heart is, then is anyone really homeless?

166. why do people write on bathroom walls and stalls?

167. how come most trains don't have cabooses anymore?

168. wondering what we did to get thanked .... from natalie merchant's "kind and generous"
       "I want to thank you show my gratitude
       My love, and my respect for you, I want to thank you
       Oh, I want to thank you, thank you; thank you, thank you
       I want to thank you, thank you; thank you, thank you"
and if that is not enough thanks, alanis has a new song out neamed "thank you"

169. does the favorite hangout of the seinfeld characters have a name other than restaurant?

170. if jerry lives in 5A, kramer in 5B, and newman in 5E ... who lives in 5C and 5D?

171. i present to you the phrase "right as rain" ... does this mean sunshine is left or wrong?

172. how come we never see the frasier character names maris?

173. ok, if the bases are loaded in baseball and the batter is walked .... why does this score a run ... seems like it would score a walk to me

174. God is powerful enough to make the chicken and the egg at the same time, guess that ends the which came first debate

175. what's the deal with the correlation between women on christian television and being a poster child for make up abuse?

176. how am i pondering ... call 1-800-iponder

177. recent medical advances has now allowed the possibility of arm transplants ....... my question is .... if the person who gets the transplantcommits a crime, will he leave behind the fingerprints of another person?

178. just who did the voice for the now famous "you got mail" and "welcome" on aol?

179. just what are brownie points? i don't recall the edges of my brownies as being sharp ....

180. let us consider the term "shoplift" ...... i think that it would be ratherhard to lift a shop ... unless you were one of those dudes on late nightespn strong man competition people

181. for those of you who have seen monty python and the holy grail .... think about the scene in which the knight comes through on a horse andslays the history guy ..... is this an old school drive by?

182. can anyone really tell the difference between the baldwin boys of hollywood?

183. if money talks, what does it say?

184. how come field trips rarely involve going to fields?

185. was woodstock a field trip?

186. when someone says that they have been called almost every name in the book, just where is this so called book?

187. if someone designed a mint flavored condom, could they market it as a condiment?

188. what will happen if i get a furby wet? (think gremlins)

189. where exactly did that phrase "apple of (someone's) eye" come from? ... funny, i don't remember an apple being a part of the human eyeanatomy

190. if a stand up comic sits down on a stool during a performance, is he/she then considered a sit down comic?

191. here is one from clueless mindy's cousin, kyle, as he was waiting to get his tires rotated .... "i figure i spend 14,000 miles rotating my tires.what do i have to sit over there for an hour and let them do? rotate mytires."

192. have you ever wondered if the whole michael jackson wearing one white glove thing was a symbolic means of telling the world he was black,yet at the same time becoming white?

193. why do m&m's taste the same regardless of what color they are?

194. why are there more brown m&m's?

195. if schools are out b/c of snow, yet the school zone lights are on due to the fact they are on timers, do you legally have to slow down?

196. pondering the phrase "time stops for no one" .... does this mean that morris day and the time still singing then?

197. if "sheep go to heaven and goats go to hell" (lyrics from that song by cake) then what is the fate of the llama?

198. if there somehow is life on other planets ... i wonder what their humans look like in their movies?

199. who would win in a fight between cartman and beavis?

200. what is the avg. height from the ground to a grasshopper's knees? just wondering, so i will finally know just how high "knee high to agrasshopper is" the next time someone uses the phrase

201. what did the earth orbit around before God said "let there be light"?

202. if heat flows from hot objects to cold objects then did you know as log as our refridge is colder than the room temperature, then we willnever be able to make the room cooler by opening the refridge.

203. ever bought a drink and it said refrigerate after opening ..... you know i was thinking i might want to actually drink it after i opened it (.... i know, i'm being a smart butt again)

204. room temperature? what temp. would that be? i mean no matter how hot/cold it is where you are, it is room temperature.

205. if people under 18 are called minors ... are people over 18 technically majors then?

206. ever notice the similarities between paul from the bible and a deer? i mean, the side of the road, a bright light, and their lives never where the same .....

207. why do furniture stores always loose their leases ... seems every time you turn around they are having these "going out of business, lost our lease sales"

208. who was the first car salesmen to come up with the idea that he/she could sell cars by being loud, stupid, and annoying on their commercials?why did this catch on with other car lots and local businesses acrossamerica?

209. why are tv commercials louder than the program your watching?

210. does anyone actually know the words to that song all the drunks mumble on new years?

211. why will i get up from my chair and search around the room for the remote, when my chair is within reaching distance of the controls on thetv itself?

212. starving artist sales ... should i take money to buy a painting or food?

213. can someone get out of being convicted of aggravated assault, if they use the defense that they we're not aggravated at the time of the assault.... they just we're in a good mood and felt the need to hit this guy for no reason .....

214. i wonder what the job description looks like for a springer security guard

215. what is it about getting in a car that makes people feel they can tailgate other cars, i mean, none of us would go walking down the malland walk so close behind someone that we are almost tripping over them......... yet people have no problem with doing such when they get acouple of tons of metal and plastic between them

216. why does judge judy have such an attitude problem?

217. if i imagine a tree falling in my mind, does it make an imaginary sound?

218. what would psychology be today if psychologists would have had normal childhoods?

219. why do we have bookmark capabilities on our web browsers? .... it's not a book .... why not webmarks or netmarks?

220. how come mtv plays less and less music?

221. ever notice how almost every vh1 legends, behind the music, etc. can be summed up in "they had it all, and lost it"?

222. footey plays the six degrees of kevin bacon ... i graduated from the university of tennessee on the same day as peyton manning (or for amore personable link, i met peyton in his dorm room one night ... a perkto having a roommate who was a student trainer at ut) ... peyton has beenon david letterman ... kevin bacon has either been on letterman or someone who he has been in a movie with has been on letterman.

223. the word for today ... addition ... for tomorrow is today plus one......

224. ever notice how every song elmo sings is to the tune of jingle bells?

225. does time stop at absolute zero?

226. alas ... rejoice ... for at least we are not bugs .... do they ponder theways of their life ... like why they have an obsessive-compusive desire towards lights .....

227. why is the phrase "hit the sack" used to describe going to bed? i fail to see how hitting anything would make you sleepy.

228. why does the media of today choose to pick a lead news story and then run it in the ground? ... while my heart goes out to the kennedy's andthe school shootings .... i fail to see why a 30 minute news cast should bekennedy's, weather, and sports

229. why does fonzy have such an affinity to the bathroom?

230. why does judge joe brown having an affinity for saying "what's wrong with you?"

231. combining thoughts from larry's ponderings (585,597,598)......
<<585  If the world was full of Supermans, would anyone need rescuing?
597  Does one really save time (or Daylight) during Daylight Savings Time?
598  If time can be saved, then was time in trouble? >>
if the world was full of supermans, would we need daylight savings time?

232. what is larry's obsession with wanting me to take the time to number my ponderings.

233. why does Brett Farve shave his legs, but not his face?

234. what is the deal with Bruce Willis in movies with numbers in the titles ... 12 Monkeys, 5th Element, Sixth Sense, and coming in 2000 Whole Nine Yards?

235. why do so many baseball players have goatees?

236. why do farmers wave to everyone that passes by, even if they don't know them? btw, this phenomenon is best seen by driving through small communities in the rural south.

237. can sportscasters talk without using their hands?

238. if a group began to oppose teaching our kids babies come from storks ... would there be a Scopes Stork Trial?

239. why did seinfeld stop doing monologues before and after the show?

240. if knowing is half the battle, what is the other half?

241. imagine this conversation ... Darryl and Darryl (from Newhart), the Darling boys (Andy Griffith Show), and a mime from central park.

242. what is the purpose of those tires that will stay inflated 50 miles after you puncture them? what good does this 50 miles do you when you typically don't know you have a flat tire until it is FLAT.

243. why do people request their favorite song for trl, yet talk over it while it is on. (not that i care to hear most of what is on trl these days ... yet it still makes me wonder.)

244. at the rate mtv goes, will there someday be a road rules or real world that has only one straight person in a cast full of gays?

245. what is a thing-a-ma-bob?

246. if chocolate milk is said to come from chocolate cows, then do chocolate eggs come from chocolate chickens?

247. why do modems make strange sounds when connecting?

248. how come ricky martin is on entertainment tonight almost every other night?

249. the possible demographics on an individual who could make it on the most talk shows.
A single female, 18-21 years old, who was rebellious and out-of-control in her late teen years, who is unsure of the father of her 2 year old daughter, who has been seeing another female behind her boyfriend's back ... Her talk show progression ..... first she appears on Sally for boot camp, then to montel for a paternity test, then to springer ... need we say more ... if the person happens to straighten her life up and become famous ... she can get on ophrah in her mid 30's as a woman who has overcame obstacles and made something of life.

250. taking into account the conservation of energy and the fact the sun is giving its heat to the earth .... if the earth keeps getting warmer, does that mean the sun is getting colder?

251. if satan is the father of lies, who is the mother?

252. when britney spears sings "hit me baby one more time", what is she really saying?
          (a) she promotes domestic violence
          (b) she is a sadomasochist
          (c) she is playing blackjack

253. if evolution was true (which i suppose it is not) .... what did the first one cell organism evolve from?

254. what ever happened to Fubu jerseys, 0-4?

255. you know how when you come out of a club or concert ... everything is muffled sounding ... and then your ears ring ... do your ears really do this while in the club and you never know it b/c there is too much noise?

256. a few random notes about that big brother show ...
(a) if you watched the 1st episode and the episode where the 1st guy got kicked out .... didn't you want to take over the broadcast and insert clips from monty python & the holy grail where all those people just yell out "get on with it"
(b) on the 1st episode they made this huge deal about how once you walk out that front door, your out ... did you notice when then first guy was kicked off, the whole rest of the big brother house walked outside the front door to say bye to him ...... shouldn't everyone be disqualified and the show end right there?

257. a few random notes about survivor ....
(a) anybody else have the urge to vote the host off the show?
(b) ever stop to think what would happen if abc did the show rather than cbs .... the person would write down who they vote for ... only to have regis say ... "is that your final answer"

258. what is, and what should never be?

259. reality based tv, is it real? or is it ity?

260. anyone know which real world season we are now? anyone care?

261. speaking of mtv, (marketing television), two reasons why beavis & butthead could not be on mtv these days:
(a) while they do play videos that could be easily made fun of, they play only the same 5 videos (a.k.a. trl)
(b) beavis & butthead had to find something else to do with life other than watch videos all day ... for we all know mtv doesn't play many videos these days.

262. is carson the antichrist?

263. will cbs take  mtv's lead and provide us with a big brother vs. survivor challenge show?

264. how come children at play signs stay up so long, that the children that were playing are now old enough to have children of their own.

265.  AOL .... caution, children at play.

266. does free verse poetry cease to be free when it is placed in a poetry book and sold to the public?