E-mail Humor
    What Men Say and What it Means
    By Footey
    These comments are not necessarily the view of the author, that's me, nor are they to represent all males. This list was written after I found a similar list on the internet, written by a female, that made it sound like all us guys think about is sex. Contrary to this popular belief, we do think about other things....ok, on with the list. 

    The first comment will be what he says, the second comment will be what he means.....

    * what do you want?
    i'm clueless, i can't figure out what women want so i will ask you and compare it to an appropriate translation on a what women say and what they mean list.

    * we need
    i need

    * it's your decision
    even if the decision was mine, you would over rule it, so therefore, it is your decision

    * do what you want
    nothing i say will keep you from doing otherwise, so i may as well sound supportive

    * we need to talk
    when you hear this statement from a guy, you know he actually needs to have a serious talk with you, just pray that the following words are not " we should just be friends"

    * sure, go ahead
    this means he really wants to go play ball or something for a few hours, he gives you the ok to do something, so he then can have some free time to do what he wants, once again he is sounding supportive

    * i'm not upset
    i'm in denial

    * ehhhh, huh, huh, heh, boinggggg!!!!
    i'm stuck in my childhood, welcome to my inner beavis

    * this kitchen is so inconvenient
    my remote is out of range, i can't go to the fridge and flip through commercials at the same time

    * i want new curtains
    quick, check your man's vitals!!!!

    * do you love me?
    i'm insecure and need an ego boost

    *yes
    yes

    *no
    no

    *maybe
    i'm not sure what you want me to say, so i'm playing it safe

    *do you want fries with that
    i'm cheap

    * oh <insert object here> is broke, let me look at it
    i'm going to take it apart,try to fix it, get it working and back together, except for this thing-a-ma-bob here that i can't figure out where it goes....needless to say, it will be broke again in a month, cause that thing-a-ma-bob really needed to be in there

    * hey there groovy chick
    greg brady and i are one

    * i am always right
    i am a liar

    * i can admit when i am wrong
    i know i have crossed the line and screwed up, therefore i know when to begin sucking up

    * i am always wrong
    i am lacking self-confidence and esteem

    * do what
    i have no attention span

    * do who, do what
    not only do i not have an attention span, i was thinking about sex

    * so what, that me and joe want to have a race to see who can flip thru more stations in 30 sec.
    i am defensive and overly competitive

    * whatever???
    i'm confused

    * this kitchen is so inconvenient (revisited)
    the microwave no longer works, time to tear it apart

    * "look kids, big ben"
    I'm lost and i am going in circles

    * hair?, i don't know anything about hair clogging the drain!
    i'm in denial about going bald
    <--Back to Planet Footey's E-Mail Humor
    This material may be copied and pasted anywhere you wish as long as you include the following referring addy....
       http://home.bellsouth.net/p/pwp-planetfootey
    © Copyright 1997-2002 Planet Footey:
    All e-mail humor remains the property of the respective owners and has either been used by permission or regarded as public domain due to the fact it has been excessively publicly fwd'd via e-mail. Larryisms (© Copyright 1998 Llamalord Productions) used by permission.