The Dax Files

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The Life and Times of 

Dax Montana

Hunting for the Finer Things of Life

Update Your Blogrolls! www.daxmontana.net

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Thursday, October 09, 2003

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Update that Blogroll!

If you’re reading this, you haven’t updated your Blogroll. That’s cool and all, I can understand why you wouldn’t want to have to go through the trouble of clicking the “Blogroll Me” link. Of course, then you’d have to edit your Blogroll. Click the edit link thing. Hell, while your there, you might just decide to delete a few Blogs you don’t read anymore. Then in your haste, you can decide that the Dax Files just isn’t worthy of your Blogroll. Then the whole exercise becomes a giant waste of time.

Here’s why you should update your link:

1. New hosting means faster page loads…. Who wouldn’t want that?
2. A new page design will probably be coming soon…. Not another cat theme!
3. Now that I’m actually paying money to Blog…. My posts have to be great!

The party’s at the new Host. See you there. Just Damn!


posted by Dax Montana 10:19:35 AM

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Here’s the Deal

The Dax Files now has a new web host. With having to work and all the alcohol I’ve been drinking, I haven’t been able to figure out what I’m doing…yet. I have a couple of days off coming up. I’ll get it all sorted out. Until then, posting will be as sporadic as usual. Just Damn!


posted by Dax Montana 12:57:00 PM

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Rosebud

Fuck Orson Wells and all that Citizen Kane crap, Rosebud is perhaps the oldest living dairy cow living in Georgia. My father milked Rosebud, I milked Rosebud, and now my son is going to milk Rosebud. I think all Georgia school children take the Dairy field trip. If they don’t, they should. Milking Rosebud is a right of passage. I might go along on this field trip just to milk Rosebud again. How often does a kid get a chance to see a cow, much less milk one, and the oldest one at that. Just give me an icy cold glass of that vitamin D whole milk. Just Damn!


posted by Dax Montana 11:44:23 AM

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Cha Cha Changes

Y’all are killing me. You have killed my bandwidth. Just Damn! I didn’t mean to get so popular all of a sudden. Just so you know, it’s time to update your Blogrolls. The Dax Files is located at www.Daxmontana.net. So if you link to me using Bellsouth’s free hosting at Http://www.bellsouthpwp.net/j/d/jdaber, it’s time for an update.

I’ve had my own domain for many years. That’s why you don’t read me going off on Blogger. Blogger doesn’t host my site. I don’t want to rip Bellsouth either. They really have been great over the years. I’ve just outgrown them. I never really thought that would happen.

My wife and I discussed this topic quite thoroughly, she has allowed me to steal enough of the kid’s lunch money to actually pay for Blogging. I never thought I’d actually have to pay for this. I think I’m going to go with ICDSoft. Geoffery at Dog Snot Diaries recommended them. He really should get a commission.

Anyway, change those links people. www. Daxmontana.net. By the way, Just Damn! Is taken but not used. Just Damn!


posted by Dax Montana 11:43:33 AM

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The Lady, or the Tiger

Remember This story? The king forced the accused to choose one of two doors. One of the doors held a bloodthirsty Tiger (insert Siegfried and Roy joke here); the other held a fair maiden. If you can’t remember the story, go read it then come back here.

Anyway, in the spirit of the Lady, or the Tiger, Here is a little test for Acidman.

Ok, Gut dude. Choose a link. Which will turn up, a Lady? Or a Tiger?

Link

Or

Link



Just Damn!


posted by Dax Montana 7:12:58 AM

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Miss Ida

There’s been a little talk around the Blogosphere about the “nigger maids” here and here. I must say, “yep” cause I know of which they speak. My grandmother had a “nigger maid” for years. I never thought anything about her until my grandmother took ill and came to live with us. Miss Ida came too.

Miss Ida split her time between my grandmother and the Adams’ household. I never met the Adams, however they were a Jewish family Miss Ida said. Miss Ida watched us boys grow up. She was just kind of there, with grandma. I never noticed until we inherited her. She was as old as dirt and as feisty as a little rat dog. She never worked very fast. She always had a steady purposeful pace. She would clean, do the laundry, and cook dinner too. Her only requirement was her own stash of Sunkist orange soda.

Miss Ida taught me how to do laundry properly. I even knew how to fold a fitted sheet. She also taught me a few Southern recipes like Chicken and Dumplings…from scratch of course. If I had rearranged my room, like teenagers do, she would have it put back before I got home. My desk was always a mess with little papers and notes everywhere. It’s still the same way today. Miss Ida would never throw anything away. She would just stack it up in a little pile and tell me to go through it. I would find the usual notes, phone numbers, and receipts. However, she also kept gum wrappers and other obvious crap just in case I needed it. One day, I left my Bag of Dope sitting out. When I got home, I was shocked to find it rolled up neatly with a pack of rolling papers, sitting on top of the pile. She never said anything to my mother or me. She was pretty fucking cool.

My brother and I always had one chore after school that Miss Ida gave us. I had to sweep the front stoop and garage. My brother had to sweep off the back deck. That was because dirt would get tracked back in. I always did my chores for Miss Ida. My brother never did his. I did his chore because I loved Miss Ida. I respected her too. She worked her ass off everyday. She didn’t mop. She did the floors on her hands and knees. Some days I find her on her hands and knees in the hallway cleaning the fucking baseboards.

After my grandmother past away, we only kept Miss Ida one day a week for a while. We couldn’t afford a maid, but we didn’t want to put her totally out of work. Eventually, the Adams picked up all her days a week. They had younger kids and needed her help more.

While my grandmother and even my Little Bro thought of Miss Ida as a “nigger maid,” I never did. I saw her as a hardworking, old lady. I treated her with respect and dignity. After I got my license to drive, I took her to the bus stop. I even made sure I got home in time to drive her, especially on rainy days. She was a part of my family and I loved her. I’m all the better for it. Just Damn!


posted by Dax Montana 6:27:51 AM

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Full Moon Fever

My renaissance employee dropped off a little treat for his favorite manager tonight. He’s my bartender and server. When he’s not working for me, he is busy writing movie scripts and acting. He even has a part that’s “perfect” for me in one of his movies. And if all that isn’t enough, He is now my Bootlegger too.

The man brought in a pint of his best Apple Jack brandy/ wine/ rocket fuel. Good God Almighty the stuff has a kick. And I ain’t even tasted yet. That’s just from the aroma. It’s no wonder its called “sippin” whisky. If you tried to gulp it, the inside of your mouth and throat would melt. He told me he tested it out to 190 proof. I believe him too. That liquid lightnin’ caught my desk on fire when I went to light a cigarette. It kind of tastes like apples too. Just Damn!

Being a Southerner, I know where to get the good stuff. I’ve always known someone or knew someone who knew someone. That’s one area I’ve always wanted to dabble in myself. I think it would be cool to fire up my still and distill a batch of XXX cider.

My grandfather used to run the shine back in the day. I only heard about it once. He never spoke about it when my mama was around. When my grandfather passed away, he left me his .380, his cane, his bedroom suite, and his recipe. The gun got stolen from my mama’s house, The cane is in my gun rack, my daughter sleeps in his bed, and I have always want to make some of his home brew.

I wealthiest man in Lawrenceville, Ga. Has his hands in many businesses. However, Jimmy got his start in the auto parts business. He was sitting at my bar telling the boys about a few of his early customers coming in for copper tubing. He put two and two together and raised the price of copper tubing. They kept buying it and he kept making his money. Jimmy brought in some of the Moon for me to try. It was good but not as good as my guy’s Apple Jack.

I like drinkin’ tax-free liquor. It makes me feel good being bad. Just Damn!


posted by Dax Montana 5:06:48 AM

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Cracker Jack Man

While driving into work last night, I spied a Mexican work crew. As I was stopped at traffic light #7, I watched these guys bust their ass. They were busting up rocks and shoveling dried concrete. Although it wasn’t particularly hot, these guys were sweating bullets.

Every now and again, I’ll pass by one of those prison work crews, you know, the chain gang. These guys are busy policing the side of the road, busting stray litter. As with yesterday’s Mexican work crew, I usually have the same thought. I should stop and pass out icy cold bottles of Coke. I don’t know why I feel so compelled to perform such a random act of kindness. I guess I figure it’s better them than me. I know I wouldn’t want to work so hard.

Maybe my compulsion comes from my run in with the Cracker Jack Man. When I was about ten years old, I lived in this apartment complex. We were waiting until our house was ready. Anyway, after a busy afternoon of “Smear the Queer,” one of the guys shouted, “Lets go see Cracker Jack Man.” Not knowing what to expect, I agreed.

Cracker Jack Man lived in apartment 247-B. Going to his place was like a Halloween treat in March. Being the new kid, I had to knock on the door. Although I was somewhat reserved, I did the deed. I waited a long moment, and then knocked again. I could hear a faint rustling from somewhere inside the basement apartment. The door opened and there stood and old one-armed man with tobacco stained teeth. I was creeped out. I don’t know if it was the yellow teeth, or the lack of one arm. It was probably the arm thing. Anyway, I asked rather meekly, “Are you the Cracker Jack Man?” He said sure and closed the door. He came back with three boxes of Cracker Jack, one box for the each of us. We thanked him and left.

I was amazed at Cracker Jack Man’s generosity. I mean how fucking cool was that? Knock on a door and get a box of Cracker Jack. My buddy said Cracker Jack Man was cool just don’t go too often. I obeyed the rule. I didn’t want to screw up a good thing.

A few weeks later, I went back…knock, say hello, and get Cracker Jack. I think it was the third or fourth time I went, I changed things. When he came back with that coveted box of Cracker Jack, I politely said, “No thank you.” He kind of just stood there, looking at me in a puzzled daze. That’s when I asked him if there was anything that I could do for him. I told him I just wanted to return the favor. I’m not sure exactly how the conversation went, but we talked for about thirty minutes. He told me he had lost his arm in the Korean War. When I asked him why he became Cracker Jack Man, he told me that several years earlier he lost his wife and son in a car accident. He enjoyed seeing the smiles on young boy’s faces as they dug through the box of Cracker Jack looking for the prize inside. He said his boy got the same look on his face. He said he watched us through the window blinds.

I only went back one more time. We moved soon after. I made sure we stood on his porch to open our Cracker Jack, and I remember shouting, “alright, tattoos” before running off with our booty.


posted by Dax Montana 5:39:04 AM

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What Does This Mean?

While surfing, I found the o.t.p. Blog, so far so good. He posted about having lots of bandwidth. Something I’m in short supply of just now. Anyway, Ron put up a little Otis Redding. Hey, I like Otis, and a little Dock of the Bay sounded good about then. When I clicked the link, Windows Media Player opened with this Message:



I’m sure I didn’t want any DRM. Is this what the Internet is coming to? Just Damn!


posted by Dax Montana 5:15:00 AM

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Tales From the Blog Side

What to Blog? How to Blog? The Rules for Blogging. Donnie is trying to find himself as a Blogger. That is something we have all done. Isn’t it? I know I’m still trying to find my Blog style.

I never was a great linker. I always felt that it’s on every other Blog, so why put it here too? Certainly, those folks are getting the same readers I am. Hell, I still feel that way. So, Instapundit, You have nothing to fear from me.

Then there’s the Political, News, Technology, Business Blogger. Again, I dabble in that from time to time, but for the most part I don’t think I have too much profundity in those arenas. I study politics and news very carefully. I feel that it is more of a spectator sport these days. What can I write or say that will change anyone’s mind? Probably not much that hasn’t been said better somewhere else. I can only vote and my ideals are pretty much set in stone now anyway. I doubt I’ll have some epiphany and suddenly become a tree hugging hippie or some such bullshit. I doubt that I will change your mind either.

Oh sweet comedy and satire, thou hast left me to whither on the vine. Don’t get me wrong. I think that I’m a very humorous person. I just can’t seem to translate it to the written word. I tend to deal with the situational improvisational one liner comedy that occurs between two people in a dialogue. I like innuendo and word play. I use it here all the time. However, it just comes across as a mistake or goes unnoticed.

The wordsmith storyteller Bloggers are really good. You know who they are. I lean more to this type of Blog Style. I just get really lost in my train of thought and loose interest before I finish my thought though. Sometimes I find that I really can’t convey the ideas as they are in my mind. I like to think that I write well. I know I can write better than I do. However, I practice a form of Blogging that I like to call “Rip and Read” Blogging. This is a first, rough draft style post. I only edit for spelling and typos. “Rip and Read” comes from my radio days. As a news director, I got stories right off the wire service. They needed to be rewritten and edited for broadcast. If I were short on time, I would rip the stories off the wire and read it in a raw form, hence the term. I have nearly two hundred posts lying dormant in storage. They are unfinished or need to be rewritten and polished. I just lost interest in the ideas.

Just Damn


posted by Dax Montana 4:13:39 AM

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Tales From the Blog Side II

I realized that the last post was getting long. So, I decided to split it up. Anyway, I was lost in a thought about Blogging styles.

I have found that I don’t know shit about grammar. To comma or not to comma, that is my question. When should I break the thought up into another paragraph? Thank God for a spell checker too.

Another idea that just occurred to me, I read a lot of Blogs. That is what keeps me doing this Blog thing. I’ve been posting this crap on the Internet in some form or another for more than two years now. Although, this Blog is only a year and a half old, I just keep pounding away at the ole keyboard here, doing that “Rip and Read” stream of consciousness style.

Which leads me to this point. Even though I evolve or devolve my Blog style, I have found that my readership is slowly growing. Any Blogger that tells you that they don’t watch hit counters or rankings are full of shit. You know you do. I know you do too. Don’t bullshit me. I know you write for you. I write this crap for me too. However, we also know we are a part of a Blog Community. It is human nature to rank ourselves in society, a keep up with the Jones’ mentality if you will. Sure, I get discouraged that I’m not a Higher Marsupial or whatever. Sure, I get jealous that new Blogger is ranked higher than me. Oh well, I can quit or keep posting. Some days I feel like, “Hey, is this thing on? …Testing one, two, three.” I want to be heard whether I have something to say or not.

So, as we go out into the big Blog World, just remember, I don’t have a fucking clue. Just Damn!


posted by Dax Montana 4:12:33 AM

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List Blogging Pt 2.

1. I felt like crap all day today. Felt good today!
2. My headache has just now gone away. And stayed away.
3. I don’t feel like reading any Blogs. Read my entire Blogroll.
4. I have to schedule off work for the Big North Georgia Blogger Fest in Dahlonega. Done!
5. I killed the store computer’s modem. Fixed it!
6. I didn’t submit a Carnival entry this week. Work in progress for next week.
7. I didn’t log invoices. Logged!
8. I have to schedule employees. Scheduled!
9. Braves lost! Won!!!
10. I need a drink! Margarita time!
11. Just Damn! Just Damn!
12.


posted by Dax Montana 6:18:25 AM

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Speaking of Birthdays…

I can always remember my kids’ birthdays. It’s not like I could forget or anything. I just noticed a very strange pattern. Quint’s birthday is today, October 2. My father’s birthday is May 2. Ashlyn’s birthday is September 14. My birthday is August 14. Then there’s little Devin. His birthday is March 26 and my Little Bro’s birthday is October 26. Now what Dad can’t remember a birthday month?

What is another coincidence is that today is also my former boss’s birthday. (Maybe I should email him.) If that wasn’t strange enough, my wife and I secretly eloped after work one day. We went to South Carolina. There is only a Twenty-four hour waiting period and No Blood test. We couldn’t get off work the next day so we waited until the following day. When I went back into work, my boss asked if we really got married. When I said yes, he took off his wedding band and inscribed on the inside was the same date. So, my boss and I shared Anniversaries and my son shared his birthday too. Talk about job security. It was too bad that he had to sell the restaurants in order to satisfy a court order. Just Damn!


posted by Dax Montana 5:40:39 AM

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Happy Birthday!

My boy Quint is Seven years old today.



Here he is showing off his lack of teeth.

Eleven years and counting…until he’s 18! Just Damn!



posted by Dax Montana 5:08:26 AM

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Fixed

I'm at work now. That means that I fixed the Damned Modem and related communication errors. I'm so proud of myself! Of course, if I hadn't fucked it up to begin with, I wouldn't had to fix it. Just Damn!1

posted by Dax Montana 5:58:25 PM

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List Blogging

1. I felt like crap all day today.
2. My headache has just now gone away.
3. I don’t feel like reading any Blogs.
4. I have to schedule off work for the Big North Georgia Blogger Fest in Dahlonega.
5. I killed the store computer’s modem.
6. I didn’t submit a Carnival entry this week.
7. I didn’t log invoices.
8. I have to schedule employees.
9. Braves lost!
10. I need a drink!
11. Just Damn!
12.


posted by Dax Montana 3:55:32 AM