"Asking a writer what he thinks about criticism is like
asking a lamppost what it feels about dogs. "
- John Osborne

It may seem early, but if you haven't marked your calendars for this year's conference, make sure you take a moment to save the dates – October 26^th - 28^th. We're moving down the beach to the Hilton Myrtle Beach Resort, and packing in a full weekend of speakers and workshops. This year's event offers an expanded faculty, with nine agents, eight editors, and many poets and authors. Registration opens June 1^st!

The wine and bread might not be free but you can get ahead if you write your own verse. The Greenville News is looking for restaurant reviewers. Reviewers get $25 to eat at a restaurant of their choice and write 100 words about their dining experience. Contact Amy Clarke at arclarke@greenvillenews.com or call her at 298-4457 for more information.

Elysabeth Eldering didn't win the Echelon Press monthly Fast Fiction contest — she went one better. The publisher picked up her story "Butterfly Halves" to be published some time in the near future. The contract's been signed, so be on the lookout for "Butterfly Halves" coming soon as a downloadable ebook (either PDF or HTML) on www.echelonpress.com.

WoW, the literary magazine Words of Wisdom, has selected Bob Strother's story "Bite of the Dragon" for publication. The quarterly magazine is affiliated with the University of North Carolina-Greensboro and has been publishing for over twenty-five years. Nice going Bob. All we can say is "WOW!"

That might sound like Kevin Coyle has opened his own tavern, but it's just short for "Kevin's Published Again." This time his well researched story "Genshi Bakudan" has been included in Issue 237 of Bewildering Stories. The tale can be read at www.bewilderingstories.com (choose "Click here for index" under Issue 237, then click on "Kevin Coyle, Genshi Bakudan".)

The 1842 Charleston waterfront provides the setting for Chapter 1 of Steve Stewart's novel, Unto the Least of These. By my count, this is the third version of the beginning chapter, and the first one under the book's new title. But that's okay. The first chapter must hook the reader and it deserves careful thought, editing, and whatever else keeps us turning pages.

The story begins with protagonist Stephen Taylor returning from England to tour his father's cotton exchange. Steve does a great job setting the scene. I could see the warehouse vividly through Stephen Taylor's eyes. Its (the warehouse door) salt air corroded hinges groaned as black flies escaped into the sunlight. In the dim storehouse amber bands of light streaked down from the clerestory windows and lit cotton dust like fireflies. Beautiful stuff, but is it enough to snare the reader?

That was the question posed by the group's critique. Many felt the scene lacked conflict or a sense of conflict to come. Others suggested that the scene should be more character-driven — that we needed to get more deeply "into Stephen's head." A revelation by Steve of things to come sparked the idea of bringing General Manager Agnew's daughter, Annie, into the picture as a possible love interest.

The piece had a nice flow to it, and Steve definitely has a knack for description and scene-setting. If he can just find a way to grab us and fling us into the story, he'll be on his way.

Russ Haddad read Chapter 6 of his novel, Parnassius. The group felt that what we heard was not new. We had seen the squirrels, the ravens, Serena and her dog and heard all the fishing chatter before. One suggestion was to go back and combine the best of the lake scenes into one chapter.

Give us some new information we haven't heard before. This will move the story forward. Work on keeping the point of view consistent. Stay in Stu's head. Let Serena give clues about herself. When the viewpoint changes, it tends to jerk the reader. Be careful of using too many "ing" words. (I can relate to this problem myself.) Russ's dialog was good.

Russ told us the action will start in the next chapter. I look forward to finding out who Serena really is and what she is up to.

Hang in there Russ, we are here to help you! We've all been there too!

Phil Arnold's www.elvisblog.net has grown to receive thousands of hits per month. At our last meeting, Phil's blogs "Elvis and Ed Sullivan" and "My FTD Wish List" proved, again, why Phil is so popular among Elvis fans.

The Ed Sullivan Show (Sunday night on CBS) was reluctant to show the 1956 Elvis because Rock 'n Roll had given Sullivan a professional headache. A year before, another Mississippi headliner named Bo Diddley had told Sullivan he would forego his hit and do a cover of the very popular "Sixteen Tons" that was written by Kentucky's Merle Travis and taken to the chart tops by Tennessee Ernie Ford. Well, Diddley didn't and was banned from the Sullivan stage. But, Rock 'n Roll was too big to be ignored. Sullivan finally agreed to feature Elvis on three shows only after Elvis brought record ratings to competitors' networks. The clincher is that Colonel Tom Parker (Elvis' manager) had earlier offered Elvis to Sullivan for $5,000 per show. But Sullivan, ensuring Elvis would bring high ratings to CBS, gave Parker $50,000 for three Elvis appearances. Well neighbors, Elvis left the Sullivan stage not deeper in debt as the Travis ballad laments. The kid from Tupelo scored big, and Phil is right to say that Sullivan needed Elvis more than the reverse.

One constructive comment at Thursday's meeting suggested Phil welcome history into his blogs, but keep it short. Or, do a series of several blogs on one issue and state as much history as needed. So Phil, go ahead on with history but keep it in context. Another constructive comment about the blog was that Phil not use "warp speed" to document the meteoric rise of Elvis in international culture. Well put, the phrase is trite, and it would be a decade after the Sullivan show when characters from the future popularized the phrase on television.

How many recordings of Elvis does a fan need? Why does a company produce a product one way in 1967 then produce it another way in 2007? Phil explains it all. FTD is Follow That Dream, a collection of Elvis recordings started in 1999 by Sony/BMG. Reading the first paragraph of this blog, I counted that Phil had a minimum of 940 songs recorded (various formats) by Elvis before the FTD collection. So, why buy any of the 62 FTD cuts offered on www.shopelvis.com?

Other than suggestions to improve the blog's grammar/mechanics (please tell us exactly what you mean in that last paragraph), I say Phil does a good job with this blog. Wish List is for the Elvis purist. Phil notes esoteric facts about the studio workings behind a cultural icon. Simply put, FTD changes the background music of several Elvis recordings. For example, adding the FTD to your collection illustrates how Elvis sounds in rockabilly then dubbed with horns or session guitar licks for a modern sound. "A Little Less Conversation" became a big hit after FTD-ized. Phil's favorite (to date) of the FTD offerings is "Too Much Monkey Business" which is an expansion of the 1981 Guitar Man. He writes, ". . . you are hearing a collection of twenty songs that have never before been assembled together, and they all sound different than the versions you know."

Good enough, Phil. Bring more culture to the next meting. We'll bring the grammar.

The rules regarding word count submission by The Pettigru Review for fiction, nonfiction, and poetry has left nonfiction writer, Pat Stewart, in a quandary. Her humorous satirical essay on the subject would leave any respectable starving writer to consider her suggestions on how to eke out a pittance of monetary rewards and possible avoidance of IRS attention as well. I did say possible avoidance of IRS attention, didn't I?

It is quite apparent that Pat truly wants to submit her work in conformity with the guidelines, yet finds it daunting to get the word count within limits if she cannot trust her computer's method of counting. It could differ greatly from the judges' methods, in which case, according to Pat, her writing income would disappear. She also points out that if you aren't a poet, your odds of accumulated wealth from writing may diminish. So yes Pat, your 500-word pieces of nonfiction just may do the trick.

My advice to Pat would be first, to forget the legal council, as she couldn't make enough from The Pettigru Review to afford the attorney fees and secondly, we at Greenville's Chapter need more of her wild ideas and writing. That being said, I believe the folks at the IRS wouldn't understand Pat's wonderful sense of humor anyway!

Bob Strother is soft spoken and gentlemanly, a classy member of our group. He also consistently reads good work at our meetings, and his latest "All A Boy Could Give" is another winner. I was pretty freaked when Bob first introduced his dark side to us, but it is starting to show up fairly regularly now. So, we should have been ready when Bob read at the last meeting. Not me. The twist at the end left me stunned and barely able to babble "Holy cow." Sara was much more succinct when she wrote at the bottom of the page "Wow."

There was silence in the room for a bit after Bob finished, and I thought to myself, "nobody will have anything to critique about this one. It's so good." Wrong again. Soon folks were talking about how the story could be improved by adding a little back-story showing how Pete's mother ruined other past romances. And, how about some additional dialog to show how deep Pete's love for Denise really is? And, so on.

The suggestions are probably correct. If Bob wants to have a longer, really good story, he should add them. But, if his intention was to write an excellent short fiction story in less than 1000 words, I don't think he needs to change a thing. Great job, Bob.

Out on their second date, Sara shows off her equestrian skills, much to Jolly's delight. She also displays her considerable wit, a good match for Jolly's.

John Migacz keeps the scene flowing – Sara and Jolly's banter is engaging and natural, moving from lighthearted talk into deeper commentary on their developing relationship, then back to the not-so-serious topic of the ransacked picnic lunch. The scene is highly visual and includes lots of energetic movement – riding, walking, gesticulating, kissing.

Despite their apparent contentment, though, there is an undercurrent of conflict around Jolly's past. When will Jolly own up to his true love? Why doesn't he feel it's okay to tell Sara why he learned to ride a horse? Doesn't he trust her? Is he afraid of what she will think? Where is this hesitation coming from? Is Jolly selling his flame short? Does Sara really agree that she knows "all [she] needs to know?" It seems that a smart, curious person like her might want to delve a little deeper.

Some felt this chapter was too sweet, even for a romance novel. One reader clamored for conflict and Migacz reassured him he'd get it, as it turns out, in the very next chapter.

Whatever your vote, sweet or saccharine, we'll all be hankering to find out where the happy horseback-riding couple is headed.

Newcomer David Burnsworth read the opening of his novel Palmetto Heat. The title might bring on visions of a hard-hitting, gritty gumshoe with sweat-drenched armpits, a porkpie hat and a .45 in a shoulder holster, but we've yet to delve deeply into David's main character, John Trent.

The prologue deals with two security guards at a Charleston port and their inability to sound like anything more than stereotypical, uneducated rednecks. The guards are shot with a tranquilizer gun from two men who bypass expensive goods to disturb a large office in the middle of the yard.

Overall, the table liked the piece but found that it needed more attribute tags and correct paragraph settings to lessen confusion. The robbery scene needed to be tightened up to make it snappier and less passive. Just as the group came to the consensus that "John Trent" is a clichéd private-eye name, that mugging duo "Show, don't tell" and "Use active verbs" arrived and threw in a couple of swift kidney punches. The change from omnipresent to first person also rattled some cages.

SC hopes that David doesn't become disheartened at the criticism – there is a lot of good stuff in Palmetto Heat and we hope to hear more in the future.

The group was treated to another helping of Kevin Coyle's Icelandic tale The Saga of Snorri the Priest. Winter is coming on and Snorri's men are like the sombrero-wearing grasshopper of another saga who's always saying "mañana." It might be hard times ahead for the Icelanders unless they heed their young leader's advice to gather hay and dry fish.

Snorri has other problems besides the coming winter – Illugi the Black has formed a splinter group and is settling elsewhere, the Skraelings are still skulking, and worst of all – they could run out of ale. Hopefully, ale isn't the fuel for Snorri's fine poetry, though we do suspect it is Kevin's.

The table thought "dessicate such a fine specimen for later consumption" didn't sound like Icelandic guy talk, but who knows? Perhaps they were word masters and even printed a "Snorrigu Review" every year. The section with Ketil and his kettle of fish confused some folk as did "thingman" and "godi." To those folks we say:

Of their names the Norse are proud
Just never try to pronounce them aloud
Thingman and godi are different for sure
Just think of them as politicians du jour

Aimee Caruso read "The Accident", a nonfiction account of a car crash that throws the title into doubt. Was it truly an "accident"? My legal dictionary defines the term as "[a]n unforeseen, unexpected event. . . " While driving home from work one day, Aimee hears a mysterious voice shout: "Pull over—you're going to have an accident." She rejects this disembodied advice. Soon after, while stopped at a red light, she gets rear-ended, totaling her green Geo Metro.

According to Aimee, the collision was neither "unexpected" nor "unforeseen"—the lil' voice in her head had warned her all about it. She then ruminates on the role of the subconscious, or instinct, in continuous war with the logical, rational part of her mind. An interesting topic, to be sure. How many of us wouldn't like to have occasional glimpses into the future, especially while spending the day at the track? While this reviewer is dubious by nature, I can't say conclusively that the possibility doesn't exist.

Don't worry, Aimee—your "guardian angel," as you put it, shouldn't cut against you with your insurance company. My dictionary goes on to state: "In the context of an automobile insurance policy, the term includes any event that occurs unintentionally, even if due to negligence rather than to forces beyond anyone's control" (emphasis added). So, while Aimee swears that "from now on when that voice tells me to do something, I'm going to do it," whether or not she does so, she should still be covered.

Bob Strother read the next sections from his novel Burning Time. Mary Alice, Will's mother, returns home after Will's aborted shotgun attack on Fannie and the kids. Will shows up after getting punched by his father William and starts berating Mary Alice for giving his girlfriend an abortion. Mary Alice smashes Will in the side of the head "with the business end of a broomstick." Mary Alice then goes to check on Fannie, who tells her that she wants to get a divorce. Mary Alice and William talk to their lawyer and he suggests getting a restraining order on Will. William is upset about what kind of a man his son has turned out to be. Mary Alice tells him, "Sometimes, people just ... turn out wrong." William says, "Well, then, it's time to move on... We'll take care of Fannie and the children for as long as we live."

Illugi takes heat from his wife, Ingibjorg, in the next installment of Kevin Coyle's The Saga of Snorri the Priest. She accuses him of laziness, and of disloyalty for defying Snorri the Priest. Illugi says he did Snorri a favor by getting out of his way before there was a problem with who's got authority. As fall approaches, Snorri and some men return from shearing sheep to find a crowd on the beach gathered around four peaceful Skraelings. The Skraelings want Snorri to accompany them in their boat while they leave two hostages to ensure Snorri's safety. Snorri and Kormak the Christian go with them, bringing several bolts of brightly colored homespun cloth.

Elysabeth Eldering's story "Butterfly Halves" begins with two sisters named Elle and Samantha fighting over a butterfly necklace. They end up pulling the necklace in half: "Now we can both wear half," quips Elle. Before the two reach home, Elle finds herself in the kingdom of Athnamas, being addressed as Princess Elle, and Sam finds she is apparently the investigating detective on a gruesome murder case. They both try to figure out how they got where they are, and they both come to the realization that life without their sister has some good points and some bad points. Elle gets to plan a big party, and thinks, "This can be kind of fun, having all the attention on me." And Sam thinks, "Wish Elle were here to help me, but then again, she wouldn't touch a dead body if her life depended on it. Maybe it can be nice not having her around, always being in her shadow... Who knows, maybe I'll be a hero."

In David Burnsworth's mystery, Palmetto Heat, we find Charleston gumshoe John Trent talking on the phone to Morris, "the gruff public relations manager for the Mayor's office." Morris wants Trent to look into the break-in at the port, where some confidential documents were stolen. It's under Federal Jurisdiction because U.S. Customs controls the port, but Morris wants a private investigator to tell him what he's dealing with before the Feds do. Trent will pose as a reporter for The Charleston Tattler, "a sleaze rag that dished out the dirt on the rich and shameless in the city." When Trent asks about the stolen documents, Morris tells him to figure it out himself. Trent hangs up and tells his secretary to "type up the usual contract but double the retainer." Then he goes out to his car and runs across one of his informants.

Phil Arnold's Elvisblog included another two articles. "'Elvis Lives' on ETV" talks about an ETV show called "Elvis Lives," which is a new DVD release of the performance of "Elvis The Concert" in Memphis during the 25^th Anniversary Elvis Week 2002. Phil attended the concert in 2002, but he was so far from the stage that all the performers looked about 1/2 inch tall. He likes the DVD because it shows close-ups of all the live musicians and singers. "Elvis Lives" blends the music of a live band with Elvis' voice from 29 years earlier. "It is done so well, you might scratch your head and ask, 'When did Elvis play with all those old dudes.' Don't worry about it. These old dudes kick butt."

In his next piece, Phil told us about a new Graceland exhibit of 58 of Elvis's jumpsuits, called "Elvis Jumpsuits: All Access." Graceland owns a total of 88 Elvis jumpsuits out of the approximately 120 he wore from 1969 to 1977. There is also an exhibit catalog that can be purchased and Phil thinks will be a great keepsake. The only thing that disappoints Phil about the exhibit: it is housed where the "Elvis '56" exhibit used to be, and Phil was planning to see it during Elvis Week 2007. "Oh well," he says, "seeing 'Elvis Jumpsuits: All Access' will help ease the pain."

Jim McFarlane presented his story "Tempus Fugit," a tale about a preacher who has been asked "to preach in a God-forsaken village in the middle of the Carolina woods." The story at the beginning never establishes what era we are in, but hints along the way send us further back into time. The final line of the story establishes the date as 1737.

John Migacz read another section from his novel, A Second Chance. Jolly finally gets to show us some of his martial arts moves as he takes on and puts down Sara's ex and three of his buddies. Distaining the weapon presented to him by his manservant, Jolly ends the encounter and hopes for no more interruptions in his pursuit of Sara's affections.

Barbara Dougan's short story, "Reunion," continued with heroine Pam's conversation with her drunken high school ex-boyfriend Joe. Pam learns of the malicious gossip that turned him off decades ago, and how Joe's wife was killed on 911. The tale ends with Pam going back to her room alone as she wistfully wonders what her ex-husband is doing and where he is.

Newcomer Paul Garrett read his online review of the book Getting Over on the Poor by Barbara Ehrenreich. He wastes no time slamming the work and the author's ethics. "Like most liberals today, she cares for the poor as a group, but not as individuals." Paul sites and dissects many of her conclusions and ends the piece with a question of his own "...can a liberally educated left-leaning writer overcome her ideology to obtain a real understanding of America's underclass?"

The next meetings of the Greenville Chapter of SCWW are as follows:

• Thursday, April 5 - First Thursday Meeting, 6:00 p.m. at The Open Book
• Tuesday, April 17 - Third Tuesday Meeting, 6:00 p.m. at The Open Book

All genres welcome at both meetings. Suggested limit for reading selections is five double-spaced, typed pages, although longer selections may be possible if time permits.

The Open Book, 110 S Pleasantburg Drive, Greenville, SC

SCWW's new-and-improved literary journal, The Petigru Review, will feature the best writing of SCWW members in three categories: fiction; nonfiction; and poetry. The judges for each category are listed below. Submissions will be accepted until April 30, 2007. See the SCWW website for submission guidelines.

Fiction:

REBECCA GODWIN
Ms. Godwin has published two novels, Private Parts and Keeper of the House. Her short fiction has appeared in Paris Review, Epoch, Crescent Review, South Carolina Review, The Sun, and elsewhere. Among her honors are a National Endowment for the Arts fellowship in literature, a McDowell Colony fellowship, and a South Carolina Fiction Project award. Critical analysis of her work has appeared in Critique: Studies in Contemporary Fiction. She has twice served as a screening judge for the Drue Heinz Literature Prize and has also judged the South Carolina Fiction Fellowship. She earned her BA, summa cum laude, from Coastal Carolina College, and her MA from Bread Loaf School of English, Middlebury College. She has taught in Bennington College's MFA in Writing and July Programs and in the undergraduate program since 2003.

GEORGE SINGLETON
Mr. Singleton has published four collections of stories (These People Are Us, The Half-Mammals of Dixie, Why Dogs Chase Cars, Drowning in Gruel) and two novels (Novel, Work Shirts for Madmen). His fiction has appeared in The Atlantic Monthly, Harper's, Playboy, Book, Zoetrope, Glimmer Train, Georgia Review, and Shenandoah, among other magazines, and has been anthologized in eight editions of New Stories from the South. His nonfiction has appeared in Oxford American, and the anthologies Best Food Writing 2005 and Dog is My Co-pilot.

ASHLEY WARLICK
Ms. Warlick is the author of three novels, The Distance From The Heart of Things (1996), The Summer After June (2000), and Seek the Living (2005), all published by Houghton Mifflin. She is the youngest winner of the Houghton Mifflin Literary Fellowship, a founding member of the advisory board for the Novello Festival Press, and book columnist for several newspapers. In 2006, she received a fellowship in literature from the National Endowment for the Arts. She teaches in the MFA program at Queens University in Charlotte, North Carolina, and at the South Carolina Governor's School for the Arts and Humanities.

Nonfiction:

JACK BASS
Mr. Bass teaches at the College of Charleston. He has written for The New York Times, Washington Post, and Los Angeles Times and is the author or co-author of six nonfiction books, including STROM: The Complicated Personal and Political Life of Strom Thurmond, The Orangeburg Massacre, Unlikely Heroes, The Transformation of Southern Politics, and Taming the Storm, winner of the 1994 Robert Kennedy Book Award. His website: www.jackbass.com.

JEANNE BROOKS
Ms. Brooks is the Metro Columnist for The Greenville News. She has received first place in column writing from the South Carolina Press Association three times in her six years with the News, and placed in the top three five out of the six years. Before returning to South Carolina, she worked for the San Diego Union Tribune, where she also wrote a metro column, and won numerous awards. Over her career, she has been a general assignment reporter and feature writer, and has written for magazines. Her blog: http://news.greenvilleonline.com/blogs/brooks/.

CHRISTINE SWAGER
Dr. Swager writes on the Southern Campaign of the American Revolution. Her first two books, Black Crows and White Cockades and If Ever Your Country Needs You, are historic fiction for young adults and focus on Francis Marion's campaign. Come to the Cow Pens! is nonfiction for young adults. Her latest book, The Valiant Died, is nonfiction adult and covers the war in the South from 1778 to 1782. She started writing about this period after retiring from the University of South Carolina because teachers complained there was little literature for their students. Her e-mail address: cswager@oburg.net.

Poetry:

DAN ALBERGOTTI
Dr. Albergotti's poems have appeared in Mid-American Review, Shenandoah, The Southern Review, The Virginia Quarterly Review, and other journals. He has been a scholar at the Sewanee and Bread Loaf writers' conferences and a fellow at the Virginia Center for the Creative Arts. His chapbook, Charon's Manifest, won the 2005 Randall Jarrell/Harperprints Chapbook Competition, and his full-length collection, The Boatloads, won the 2007 A. Poulin, Jr. Poetry Prize and will be published by BOA Editions in March 2008 (http://boaeditions.org/submissions/A_Poulin_Prize.html). A graduate of the MFA program at University of North Carolina Greensboro and former poetry editor of The Greensboro Review, he currently serves as poetry editor of storySouth (www.storysouth.com) and teaches at Coastal Carolina University in Conway, SC. His faculty webpage: www.coastal.edu/humanities/faculty/details.html?x=166.

GILBERT ALLEN
Since 1977, Mr. Allen has lived in Travelers Rest, South Carolina, and taught at Furman University. His collections of poems are In Everything, Second Chances, Commandments at Eleven, and Driving to Distraction. He received the 2002-2003 Literary Arts Fellowship from the South Carolina Arts Commission, and he co-edited A Millennial Sampler of South Carolina Poetry in 2005. His poems have been featured on The Writer's Almanac and Verse Daily. More of his biographical details and some sample poems may be found at www.southernartistry.org.

MICHELE REESE
Born in Texas and raised in West Virginia, Dr. Reese teaches at the University of South Carolina Sumter. She received her Ph.D. in creative writing from the University of Missouri, and has published poems in Mid-American Poetry Review, The Paris Review, Poet Lore, and other literary journals. In 2006, WordTech Editions published her book-length collection of poems, entitled Following Phia. Her publisher's webpage: www.wordtechweb.com/reese.html.

Printed Matters is the newsletter of the Greenville Chapter of South Carolina Writers Workshop.

Thanks to our contributing writers and news reporters:
Bob Strother, Pat Stewart, Mack Clarke, Russ Haddad,
Phil Arnold, Aimee Caruso, John Migacz, and Kevin Coyle

Copyright 2007 by Marcia Migacz, Editor. Contributing writers retain all rights to their work.

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