The statewide SCWW Board of Directors has four positions opening up this year. Elections will be held via e-mail during the month of November.

Two members of the Greenville chapter are on the ballot and could use your support: Bob Strother and Susan Boyer. Please take the time to fill out and return your ballot - it's good to have a voice (or two) in the statewide organization.

On the home front, nominations for Chapter President will be accepted at both November meetings, with the election to be held at the December First Thursday meeting.

The 15th Annual South Carolina Writer Workshop was held on October 14-16 at the Landmark Resort in Myrtle Beach. We had a strong showing from Greenville, and everyone gathered useful information and inspiration.

Activities included hands-on workshops, manuscript critiques, and breakout sessions, all with editors, agents, and authors. There were also several keynote speeches, open mic and staged readings, book signings, and an agents and editors panel. Quite a full weekend!

A second story written by Kevin Coyle (and critiqued by the group) has been accepted for publication. "Dollar Dance" will appear in the second issue of moonShine review, due to hit the stands in mid-November. Copies may be purchased on-line at www.thriftpoeticarts.com (look for the moonShine Review and THRIFT Store links at the bottom of the page.) As Kevin says: "Support small, independent publishers -- without them, I'd have nowhere to submit my stuff! Christmas is coming . . . do I hear 'boxed set'?"

Schools, libraries, bookstores, community centers and writing groups all across the country gather together November 15 for "I Love To Write Day." Help celebrate the event by checking out www.ilovetowriteday.org. Vonda Skelton, Upstate writer and teacher is the Honorary Co-Chairperson this Fourth Annual event.

Randy Crew, president of our chapter from 1993 to 2003, moved to Seattle, Washington in 2004 to try his hand as an airline steward. Here's the recent update that he shared with Phil Arnold (thanks, Phil.)

My roommate is now living with his fiancÈe (he met her on wouldyoudome.com), so I have the apt. to myself. I'm finally senior enough to have a regular schedule and regular days off. I still love it and still look forward to going to work. I'm still getting to Hawaii about every 4-5 weeks even though the price has gone up to $107 round trip. I dated a woman there for a few months, but it didn't develop. Doing some hiking in the Cascades with a friend from work. Beautiful country. I still love here. We had another summer without air conditioning and didn't miss it. My son Phillip is still in Nashville and still secretive about what's going on there. I did some more work on those children's stories, but then let it lie. That's it. Pretty routine.

Long-time SCWW member Sue Renault has been busy: travel to Angola and Ethiopia, church duties, host to refugees from New Orleans, and helping to care for a brand new grandson. Sue says, "I'm counting the months (seven) until retirement. Maybe then I'll try to become a writer. Love to all at SCWW." She's thinking about joining us at Fatz after a meeting - we hope you make it Sue!

At last month's Third Tuesday meeting, Jim McFarlane's excerpt from The Widow Dunn contained a reference to an old logic puzzle about a farmer traveling with a fox, a goose, and a bag of grain. There was some discussion about whether they had brain teasers in Widow Dunn's day, but according to the website at www.sciencenewsforkids.org/pages/puzzlezone/muse/muse0904.asp, "Brainteasers that involve ferrying people and their belongings across a river under trying conditions have been around for centuries. This particular version dates back more than 1100 years." The solution to the Fox, Goose, and Grain puzzle can be found on the website, as well as a number of other brain teasers.

Susan Boyer takes us back to the simmering environs of Stella Maris in her "Excerpt From the Hairstylist's Diary." In this well-written serving of southern-fried chick lit, we experience a view of some of the island's more colorful characters as seen from the perspective of hairstylist/color specialist Dori DiTomei. Dori's a recent transplant from New York City, but so good at what she does, the locals refuse to believe she's a Yankee. "Lauren, I told you, I would nevah let a Yankee do my hair. Her people are from Texas."

During (new client) Lauren's cut 'n color, we get a slice-of-life exposure to her, her new hubby, Doc Harper - and his ex-wife and kids. Lauren's friend Shannelle, and island mavens Mary K. and Ida Mae dispense opinions and advice in the background.

Comments during the critique acknowledged Susan's command of the "Southern" voice and her effective use of a "different" voice for the work's central character. It was suggested, and Susan agreed, that the story might be enhanced by abandoning the "diary" introduction in favor of a regular short story format.

After working primarily at novels, Susan is trying her hand at shorter pieces. Long or short, Red likes what he sees in the writing, and he's prepared to go island-hopping anytime.

I love John Migacz's essays. He takes a real experience from his life and starts to write about it. By the time he finishes, enough creative non-fiction is woven into the story to make it both interesting and funny. Such is the case with "House Spouse" (although I will offer "Revolt of the Girly-Men" as an alternate title to consider).

It is the tale of two writers who have somehow convinced their wives to stay employed while the writers stay home to work at the keyboard (if time permits after cooking meals and doing laundry). In John's story the two fellows talk about recipes and dishwashers before suddenly realizing "We're turning into a couple of girls." The solution is perfect - "Tittie-bar." You'd have to look hard to find another example of creative non-fiction that works this well.

John will probably tweak his story a bit with the minor suggestions made by the group. The reference to Sherpas and oxygen tanks while putting away the Everest-sized pile of clean laundry caused some folks to pause. May I make a suggestion I wasn't sharp enough to produce at the meeting? How about: "The daunting task of putting it away without the help of a fork-lift truck." No, that wouldn't work. Too manly.

Ray Giddens' memoir entitled "Thanksgiving at the Farm" deftly uses strong verbs, vivid adjectives, sounds, and smells to recreate a familiar picture from books and movies that most of us never experienced and don't want to. Including the names of his wife and daughter and unexpected events, such as friendly tom turkeys following Jenny about the farm, keep the picture fresh and unique.

Structurally, Ray has a recurring problem that probably aflicts most memoir writers -- he describes what he remembers, forgetting that the reader doesn't have knowledge of the details that he omits. The result is confusion over timing, motivation, and consequences.

There is no sense of the elapse of time between deciding to slaughter the turkeys, the inability to do so, their donation of the fowl to the neighbors, and the serving of ham for dinner. Is Sissie displeased by the attempted slaughter, the donation, the size of the donation, or the recipients? The phrase "I threw in the hens and the rooster" vaguely implies the farm is now fowl-free.

Lastly, what is the best way to utilize the guilt-free ButterBall turkey? The concept is excellent but its mention in the opening sentence removes the suspense. Furthermore, a memoir is often intended for the younger members of the family who do not buy, prepare, or cook the Thanksgiving turkey and probably do not understand the brief reference to the trademark ButterBall and its implications of convenience.

So, Ray, think well about how to extend your thanks to the people at ConAgra Foods, doing business as Butterball Turkey Company since 1958, a division of Armour Swift Eckrich, who process nearly eight million turkeys a year so you and I and our descendants don't have to think about how our food arrives upon our tables. I know that I am extremely grateful.

P.S. to Phil Arnold. The above statistics were quickly located via Google.

As one SCWW observer remarked to Phil Arnold, "You can connect any event to Elvis." So Phil did it with his elvisblog article, "Elvis and New Orleans."

Phil did a good job of not only linking Elvis to the Big Easy, but by giving us a tour of the sights in New Orleans. He walked us by the Roosevelt Hotel on Canal Street, took us to the Vieux Carre, Bourbon Street, and Lake Pontchartrain. Putting the lyrics from the song from the movie, "King Creole" was an especially good touch.

In the second blog, Phil lambasted "People" magazine for leaving Elvis out of the "most popular cover subject" in their 30th anniversary double edition. That makes me feel good about my habit of writing letters to the editor. Go Phil!

The third blog covered the business end of the Elvis mania. Phil wrote about a company called CKX buying out a treasure trove of Elvis memorabilia from Las Vegas. He hopes to make a rotating Elvis show, from the Hard Rock Cafe to who knows where. I was intrigued about his tip to buy CKXE stock. My financial advisor checked this stock out from Charles Schwab. I think I won't buy the stock. The PE ratio was in the minus area. I do know that a PE ratio of less than 20 is good, but minus is another thing! For the past 52 weeks, the price ranged from $0.07 to $30.65. I printed out the whole financial story from the NASDAQ. I'll pass it on at the next meeting. He just might glean another story for elvisblog.

Jim McFarlane read a continuation of Chapter Two from his novel in progress, The Widow Dunn. The happenings in Chapter Two take place a couple of years after the War of Northern Agression, sometimes referred to as the American Civil War. Laura Ann, the protagonist, is taking her two children on a five mile trip to Pennington, a western Alabama river town midway between Tuscaloosa and Mobile. On the way, Laura Ann runs into her hotheaded brother-in-law, Jesse who decides to accompany them to Pennington. Laura Ann appears to be not especially comforted by his presence.

Further down the road, when two carpetbaggers approach, Laura Ann clutches her outdated musket. At the end of the chapter, the reader is left wondering what kind of mischief will be aroused between hot headed Jesse and the two loathsome yankees about to greet them.

Jim has a knack for getting into his characters and their thoughts. He also peaks the reader's concern with prior warnings about Jesse and his troublesome past which one guesses might culminate in a confrontation with the carpetbaggers. Readers are left with a subtle cliffhanger, a woman and her two children in circumstances that could prove volatile. Wondering just what will happen next, we look forward to Jim's next episode.

Pat Stewart shared a short non-fiction piece entitled "Cruising Down the Danube and Rhine With Jack and Pat", with us during the first Thursday meeting in October. As usual, her writing was clear and concise, and the group had little to offer in the way of advice on improving it.

There was a suggestion that Pat might consider avoiding repeating the clause "bicycles have the right-of-way in Germany" in Tip # 152, and also that she clarify the antecedent to the pronoun "he" in the last sentence of the same tip. Another discussion point was that she might break the "be sure to tell the tour office about any special events" advise into another tip at the paragraph break where she begins to tell us about Jack's birthday.

I think this would make a nice article for a travel related publication or column. The touches of humor make it an enjoyable read. Thanks, Pat for taking us all on a lighthearted trip down the Danube and the Rhine!

Wilmer the Homesick Moose is the title of Kevin Coyle's first foray into children's stories. The idea is from a true story about a lost Canadian moose that bonds with a herd of cows in Vermont.

In Kevin's tale, Wilmer gets lost in a snowstorm and ends up in Vermont. After first belittling Wilmer, the cows befriend him and let him join the herd. The cows tie branches to their horns to look like antlers and Wilmer is soon heard mooing with the herd.

The group liked the name Wilmer for the moose and liked the pace of the story. They felt the tale could use a better ending, names for the cows, more alliteration, active verbs, more stress, more conflict, and more emphasis on the moral.

Wow, Fatz has trouble fitting all that into a 300 page novel let alone a short, illustrated children's book. It's good for an author to stretch and Fatz applauds Kevin's first incursion into children's writing.

Bob Strother read a short story entitled "Barefoot Healing." An old man in a nursing home, the narrator recounts how a young "woman" appeared to him at difficult times in his life. The first appearance was when the narrator was ten years old and had recently lost a beloved dog. Perched in a tree, the woman whistled and a new dog came running from the woods. The second appearance was when the narrator, a jilted groom at the age of nineteen, contemplated suicide by drowning in a creek. The woman rose from the creek and kissed him, making him forget all about what's-her-name. Finally, while the narrator was living alone after the death of his wife of thirty-seven years, the woman, surrounded by fireflies, came to him for a night of love that "lasted me a long, long time."

I liked how the narrator never bothered to try to explain the appearance of this mysterious woman as either a wood nymph or dryad or some other mythological creature. Maybe all this was just a hallucination, but who cares? The narrator was obviously comforted by the experience. My only criticism is the long introductory paragraph, which steals some of the thunder from the rest of the piece. I don't need to be told that the old man's story "might even make [me] smile" - if Bob's done his job correctly, I'll be smiling regardless.

Bob Strother's book Love Among the Greeks continued with Johnny's teaching assistant job getting put on hold because of his personal difficulties with the professor. At a party towards the end of the semester, he sees ex-girlfriend Randy and trades barbs. Next he calls Rivers and discovers that she left for the summer without saying goodbye. Finally, he shows up at his high school girlfriend's house (she'll be a senior next year) and asks her to go out with him again.

Susan Boyer presented an essay "In Praise of the Southern Redneck." Sparked by a family discussion of one aspect of political correctness, Susan reflects that "we have become a planet full of the overly sensitive." According to Susan, not only do Southern Rednecks "not hear insult where none was intended, they ignore blatantly obvious slams. They do not care what you or I think of them because they are happily going about the business of living their lives, enjoying their liberty, and pursuing their happiness... Rednecks do not take themselves as seriously as some of the rest of us... Maybe we should all try to be a little more like them."

Elizabeth Eldering shared one of her series of short stories for middle school kids. Each story will deal with a different state in the U.S., presenting clues and challenging the reader to figure out the name of the state and some landmarks within that state. The clues in this story were presented in the context of four children working on a summer assignment for their upcoming social studies class.

In Jim McFarlane's book The Widow Dunn, tension runs high as two carpetbaggers accost Laura Ann Dunn, her son and daughter, and her brother-in-law Jesse on the road to market. One carpetbagger rides away, ostensibly to get them help for their broken-down wagon, then circles around from behind and holds a gun to the head of Laura Ann's daughter, Dora. The carpetbaggers destroy Laura Ann's musket and tie up Jesse and the two children. In response to her question, "What are you going to do to us?" Laura Ann receives the unsettling response, "Here's the good news. I don't care for boys and the girl's too young."

To close the meeting, Phil Arnold shared two items from his Elvisblog site:

"Exclusive... Elvis - The Untold Story" is the headline of "the famous September 6, 1977 issue of the National Enquirer, with its cover photo of Elvis in his open casket." "The National Enquirer's Elvis in his Coffin issue is the most sought after copy of any in the history of magazine publishing ... to the tune of 35,000 requests per month."

In "How Did I Ever Miss Elvis-A-Rama", Phil bemoans the fact that he was wrong to avoid the Las Vegas museum based on the "tacky little tourist trap" name. While doing research for a recent Elvisblog article, he discovered that "this is a large, high-quality exhibit not to be missed by Elvis fans... [containing] over 2000 artifacts valued at over $6 million." The name "Elvis-A-Rama" comes from "a magnificent 10-foot tall, 85-foot long mural that celebrates Elvis' life and career." Phil ends by saying, "Now I get it."

The next meetings of the Greenville Chapter of SCWW are as follows:

• Thursday, November 3 - First Thursday Meeting, 6:00 p.m. at The Open Book
• Tuesday, November 15 - Third Tuesday Meeting, 6:00 p.m. at The Open Book

All genres welcome at both meetings. Suggested limit for reading selections is five double-spaced, typed pages, although longer selections may be possible if time permits.

The Open Book, 110 S Pleasantburg Drive, Greenville, SC

long drive unintelligible hotel clerks hallways with plain concrete floors no rugs dripping water caution tape lost in a renovation in progress faces that look familiar faces that you want to talk with faces that you recognize and want to avoid bad food good food where are the restrooms good sessions bad sessions where are the restroomsÖ

Humm, William Price Fox's advice to begin a piece with a run-on sentence might work for him but not me. He says it unleashes the sub-conscious - hey, what makes him think Fatz even has a sub-conscious?

Fatz's fingers are inspired though, having just returned from the 2005 SCWW Conference at Myrtle Beach. He tries to go every year, looking for that light hidden under a bushel basket called inspiration.

It's there. Believe me, it's there. It comes disguised in the form of writers, agents, publishers, editors, million-seller authors, oldsters, newsters, crazies, aggressives, passives, structured sessions, bull sessions and folks without a clue. You never know when a seminar comment or someone you meet will click in your head and push your writing onto the next plateau.

Additionally, the Conference is a whirlpool of images. An idea for a character, a story notion or an essay theme can approach in the guise of a lost little old lady or an angry author. All we have to do is what writers should do - observe. Watch two people greet - how would I write that? A gnarled hand clutching a cane - how would I write that? The overly made up face of a matron - how would I write that?

The day-to-day grind blurs your writing goals, and going to the SCWW Conference is like sitting in the optometrist's chair and staring through his big black examination machine:

"Which is better? One." Good.
Flip.
"Or two?" Better.
Flip.
"Or three." Best.
Flip.
"Or four?" I can see your house from here!

The SCWW Conference optometrist can sharpen your writer's eye and put a little clarity in your writing. That's something we all can use.
Fatz is sure there will be a 2006 SCWW Conference.

Be there.

Printed Matters is the newsletter of the Greenville Chapter of South Carolina Writers Workshop.

Please forward critiques, comments, ideas, and submissions to Printed Matters Editor Marcia Migacz at marciamigacz@prtcnet.com.

Thanks to our contributing writers and news reporters:
Bob Strother, Phil Arnold, Jim McFarlane, Pat Stewart, Ray Giddens, Susan Boyer, John Migacz and Kevin Coyle

Copyright 2005 by Marcia Migacz, Editor. Contributing writers retain all rights to their work.

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