Prolific poet and storyteller Gene Fehler's new book is now available for preorder at Amazon.com. His children's book Goblin Giggles: A Ghastly Lift-the-Flap Book has gobs of stickies, slitheries and scabs. "Gordon Goblin's day seemed drab until he tore a giant scab right off his face. Do you suppose what disappeared was Gordon's nose?" On each page a gatefolds lifts to reveal rhymes and repellent surprises.

Congratulations Gene, on another published work.

Kevin Coyle's short story, "Ish Kabibble" has been published in the premier issue of moonShine review, a literary journal out of Charlotte, NC. Copies may be ordered by sending $5.00 (plus $1.50 shipping) to THRIFT Press, PO Box 5424, Charlotte, NC 28299. moonShine review will also be sold at certain bookstores in Charlotte and Asheville, NC, and will soon be available at www.thriftpoeticarts.com.

Congratulations, Kevin!

Phil Arnold mentioned that an interested party sent him an e-mail request to write a book about Elvis. More details to follow, but man, that's a good start!

At our last meeting, the group critiqued a query letter written by Phil Yanov. Using suggestions from that meeting and his own good sense paid off for him this week. The publishers have asked to see a proposal for the book "Outwitting The Media: Do It Yourself Publicity for your Business, Service, Product, or Organization." Way to go Phil! (P.S. Phil sends his thanks to the group for the assistance.)

New member Phil Yanov mentioned that he will be doing occasional seven-minute spots about Technology on the NPR radio show "Your Day", hosted by Charlotte Holt. The show airs statewide on Mondays through Thursdays from noon to 1:00 P.M.

The Greenville Literary Association's fourth annual Really Good, Really Big, Really Cheap Book Sale will be held on Saturday, August 20, 2005 at McAlister Square on S. Pleasantburg Drive, Greenville SC, from 8:30 a.m. to 4:00 p.m. Last year, 10,000 people attended the sale, over 350 volunteers helped make the event possible, and approximately 80,000 books were sold.

The SCWW Writers Conference will be held on October 14-16, 2005. Details can be found on the SCWW website (http://www.scwriters.com/2005)

Registration for the conference is open and should be completed by September 1 if you want to take advantage of the Early Bird Discount. You can access a registration form from the statewide SCWW website.

On the SCWW statewide website (http://www.scwriters.com/mbrshp.htm) you will find a Membership Application Form. Print out the form, and send it in with a check to: Membership, SCWW, P.O. Box 7104, Columbia, SC 29202. Membership fees are $50 for an individual, $75 for a family per year, renewable on the anniversary of your initial payment. If you have questions about membership in SCWW, please e-mail Shari Stauch (SJStauch@hotmail.com).

Please forward critiques, comments, ideas, and submissions to Printed Matters Editor Marcia Migacz at marciamigacz@prtcnet.com.

The next meetings of the Greenville Chapter of SCWW are as follows:

• Thursday, August 4 - First Thursday Meeting
• Tuesday, August 16 - Third Tuesday Meeting

All genres welcome at both meetings. Suggested limit for reading selections is five double-spaced, typed pages, although longer selections may be possible if time permits.

REVIEWS

This is one for all you expectant parents out there. So listen up - your baby is! That's right. In "Sounds of Silence", Pat Stewart explores the influence audible sounds have on the little guy or gal still nestled comfortably in the womb.

When Pat was expecting her seventh child, she and husband Jack went to the movies to see "The Graduate". A few days later son Andy was born, and eighteen years later, Andy was apparently so taken with the same movie, he and his future wife watched it over and over again for at least four consecutive years while they attended Clemson. Coincidence? Pat doesn't think so, and she cites recent studies confirming fetuses do respond to audible vibrations while in the womb. She also gives partial credit for Andy's turning out to be a fine young man to Simon and Garfunkel. Red would argue for influences closer to home, but who knows? Big band music always starts his toe a' tapping.

In the critique, some felt Pat was telling two separate stories: one about the effect of sounds on the fetus, and another about the machinations the family went through in selecting a name for the child. She was encouraged to try and make the two story elements more cohesive. Another suggestion was to rearrange the sequence to start off with a grown-up Andy talking about his fascination with "The Graduate".

This reviewer particularly liked the dialogue surrounding the Stewart family offerings for naming the seventh child. If Pat can't find a way to weave it into "Sounds of Silence", maybe it can become a story of its own.

"The airport was crowded with Friday morning traffic" begins Sarah Cureton's Breathe, a finished manuscript from which Sarah shared the first five pages. The story opens as her character Raquel ponders the difficult balance of her family life and career as she slogs through the inconvenience and sensory overload of a prolonged wait in a busy airport terminal. All five of the presented pages were margin to margin description and even though it's well written, the group felt like they would like to have seen more whitespace. The group felt that the point of view character may be struggling with her life, but that doesn't mean the reader should be struggling to get through the narrative.

"Add some dialogue!" they said.

Good construction made these pages of Breathe quite readable and the review group was largely reduced to picking punctuation nits and wrangling over the use of italics rather than ironing out the story line. (That is a good thing.) One objection raised by a number of those present was that the reader's first encounter with Ashe left them uncomfortably questioning the gender and relationship of the character to the narrator. (It turned out she was the daughter and not the husband.) We agreed that the judicious insertion of some disambiguating text would add to the enjoyment of the paragraph.

The Breathe manuscript delivers great descriptions of the airport, the characters, and the intertwining of the character's lives. It also hints, even in these early pages, to the coming conflicts between them. I look forward to seeing how Sarah develops these characters and situations in future sessions. Until then, I'll try to "Breathe" normally.

Ray Giddens read his piece, "John Quincy Clements." Quince, as he was called, was Ray's grandfather. While most of his family went to college, Quince decided to become a farmer. He had problems with droughts and losing his cow Betsy.

He made extra income from his corn crop by using it to manufacture moonshine. One day he was sure the revenuers were on his trail and he found a way to hide two jugs of shine under the quilt in his baby's cradle. As it turned out, it wasn't revenuers he heard in the bushes, it was Betsy, the lost cow.

Ray's second story was a dream sequence where he woke his wife to tell her about his dream. He described seeing his grandfather in his room, telling him goodbye. "He was lighted up like one of those plastic Santas."

Later that night he got a phone call from his father telling him about the death of his grandfather. I liked the way Ray described his feelings about his grandfather and how it made a unique connection with him.

There were a few comments to tighten the story. In the part where he talked to his wife about the dream, he could make his comments more muddled, like a groggy person just waking up. "He said no actual words," a phrase that could be more confused and not so precise. The first paragraph was confusing and could probably be omitted.

He does give us good details about life in the era he writes about. It gives a good flavor to his characters.

Both stories are the kind that are valuable to pass on to one's family.

I hope he keeps writing these for his children and grandchildren.

When, at an earlier meeting, Steve Heckman stopped in the middle of his short story "Standing on Plastic", I found myself cursing him for leaving me hanging in suspense like that. My intuition was correct, and the conclusion of the story was well worth waiting for.

Donnie, the narrator of the story, arrives at the house of a woman named Theresa to try to rescue her from a botched suicide attempt. He manages to talk her out of it, and takes her back to his apartment so he can use his first aid kit to patch her up. Theresa goes straight to the kitchen to investigate Donnie's own suicide device, involving a gun and a ping-pong paddle, but somehow, things go way wrong...

The group felt that Steve did a good job with this dark subject, lightening it up with a "quirky tone," and an ironic internal monologue. They were a little bothered by the amount of dialogue that occurred before the characters even started to deal with Theresa's injuries. Most folks thought that the philosophical discussion about suicide was awfully comfortable for two almost-strangers, one of them naked and bloody. No one complained, however, about the end of the piece, which shocked, but did not disappoint.

One of the newest members of our group, Philip Yanov, read half of his essay entitled "Ten Pitches." That was a shame, because we only got to hear the first five. If the second five were half as funny as the first (wait a minute - would that make it "Seven and a Half Pitches," humorously speaking), the essay would be a good read, indeed.

My favorite line comes from Philip's second pitch: "My Life at the World's Most Unusual University." Philip says about his alma mater - a particularly infamous school right here in Greenville - "While that moniker might more frequently be seen on roadside balls of twine, collections of stinging bugs, or erotic lawn statuary, it is not often applied to universities." When I get back from Iceland, I'll tell you all about another "world's most unusual"- the Icelandic Phallological Museum - that could be added to his list.

The group's least favorite pitch was Philip's fifth: "Living Southern: A How To Guide For The Recently Transplanted." As soon as Philip started reading this one, I knew he would get into trouble, since this is a touchy subject for many people. All touchiness aside, this one tended to stick with stereotypes, and as a result, wasn't as funny as the others. Swing and a miss! Nobody can expect to hit every pitch out of the park.

If Philip ever really tries to develop any of his pitches into a book, I'll look forward to reading it, particularly the second one.

I fall right into "Baby, Don't Say Don't" excerpts! Bob Strother's knack for dialogue-scripting slides you easily into the scene, and he really captures the larger than life emotivity of those hormone-charged adolescent years. Previously, 14-year-old Zelma took 12-year-old Jeff into her tutelage for a little no-hands kissing, but then dropped her eager student when the oh-mi-god-gorgeous Reggie moved into town and onto Zelma's lips. In this installment, Reggie dumps Zelma - on the phone, no less - and she rushes right over to Jeff for consoling. Jeff, our hero, handles the emotional breakdown of his friend - and former kissing coach - with Don-Juanese savvy.

Zelma falls easily into Jeff's arms again. After all, Jeff is safe. Jeff is two years her junior. She taught him everything he knows. So, in a fit of adolescent melodrama, she flings herself at him, pumping him for reassurances, lamenting that "the kissing practice didn't work."

But, her assessment is apparently not entirely true. Jeff learned something. He flips the script on Zelma, taking control of the situation - and his former teacher - deftly shifting her from despair to spiteful-speculation. (Darth Vader's voice echoes in the background, "Now, I am the master.") Now, Reggie's gay with little feet - but wait! - Jeff's not done. Without missing a beat, he negotiates to reinstate his smooch-sessions with Zelma. What a smoothie! What a ride! What Zelma lacks in subtlety, Jeff makes up for in babe-soothing skill.

The most notable group observation - at least, the only one I remembered - was whether a 12-year-old is capable of such smooth operation. It'll be interesting to see how this story unfolds - especially if Zelma wakes up and realizes that she's no longer in the driver's seat!

ELVIS IS ALIVE AND RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT. The title of Phil Arnold's blog is enough to force the reader's eyes to read the rest of POATE's article. The idea of Elvis (who Phil states has been doing missionary work in Australia) running for President isn't that far fetched. We've had actors and idiots elected President, why not a Rock & Roll King? Oh yeah, there's that pesky being dead thing, but I'm sure the political consultants can work their way around that one. After all, look what they've done for our last crop of presidents.

Phil's other two blogs, about Jerry Lee Lewis and Turner Classic Film's Fourth of July Elvis extravaganza while interesting, don't grip SC Fatz the way the idea of Elvis running for president does. Imagine if the King hadn't died...

First, maybe a short stint as mayor of Memphis, then the governorship of Tennessee as a stepping stone to the White House. Can you see the Oval office outfitted with green shag rugs? A guitar-shaped rose garden? A press conference in the jungle room? Ah... the possibilities are fascinating - and lots of fun to think about.

We've had a few alternate history stories pop up at the meetings lately and this possibility shines like a gold nugget on a sunny day. What do you say POATE? It needs you to write it.

Ashley McCollum's untitled story will be relatable to the 10-12 year olds for whom it's intended. The time when the individual emerges from the child can be filled with problems, questions and anxieties, and it's one of these moments the story explores. The protagonist is Sam, short for Samantha, and her feelings about her name give hints as to one of those problems. Sam is also feeling neglected due to her dad's long absences. A trip to the mall and his letting her choose a CD doesn't ease her anger and his attempts to communicate are rejected.

The group felt that the story hinted at Sam's problem but the hook was lost in the details of the tale. The use of her parents' names instead of "Mom & Dad" sparked discussion about Sam's attitude toward her parents and how she, as the narrator, can gain the readers' trust. It was felt that more tension was needed to draw the reader into the story. The new arm of the "Show Don't Tell" police, the "Don't Show Then Tell" gendarmes, arrived and fired rubber bullets into the crowd.

Fatz welcomes Ashley into the group and is glad to finally see a story written at his reading level. Ashley, please bring more.

Kevin Coyle read five more intriguing pages from his alternate history story "The Private Burning." It’s a "what if" story that assumes that budget cuts didn’t happen and Richard Nixon was accepted as an F.B.I. agent in 1937. True to his nature, Nixon is still after commies and is rooting them out of their pink haven known as Hollywood.

In this section, Nixon has used his influence to meet the star of "Gone With the Wind," Cat Ryan, at the Brown Derby. Nixon’s secretly in love with Cat and the meeting gives him a bad case of jitters intermixed with rage at the world – very much like the Nixon in our time line that we all knew and – well, you know how he was.

Kevin has captured Nixon's essence and brought to life a scary picture of our past President. His research is exacting, from the period clothing to the noir feeling of the nightclub. His blending of our time line and the alternate is fun, from Nixon’s fixation on Cat (who will be Pat Nixon in our time line,) to the sentence "I had a much stronger expletive in mind, but I deleted it from my lips."

The group had few suggestions and liked the strong characterization of Nixon. It was felt that the terms "Hollywood Ten" and "HUAV" might be too obscure for most readers and needed some expounding.

We have an alternate history in each of our lives. Who of us hasn’t wondered: What if we didn’t take that job? What if we didn’t marry that girl? What if we didn’t move here?

What if...

This month we had a first - all ten of the people who attended the Third Tuesday meeting also went to Fatz Café afterwards. It seems that whatever we're doing at the meeting, people don't want it to end...

Holding with tradition, Bob Strother read first from his novel Love Among the Greeks. In this installment, Johnny and Randy leave a party and head for a night alone in a borrowed house. On the way, Randy accidentally calls Johnny by the name of her Psychology tutor, and although they end up making love that night, Johnny realizes that this will be the last time because the relationship is over.

Next, John Migacz continued his novel Second Chance. Jolly and his adoptive father's Japanese business partner Imuro talk while in a roadside diner. Jolly learns that he is a silent partner in Gaijin Exports. He makes a call to Roscoe, his bookie, to secure $50,000 which Imuro will be able to use for loans due.

Kevin Coyle shared another part of his short story "The Private Burning." An alternate history version of Richard Nixon, now an FBI agent, is in the Brown Derby Restaurant with his long-time obsession, Cat Ryan. Nixon tells Cat, "Someday I'm gonna marry you!" but her reaction is not what he hoped for. Later, he shows up at Ronald Reagan's apartment, gets slightly drunk, and rambles on about the Communists and his Enemies List.

In Susan Boyer's novel Low Country, we meet Liz's family and witness the reading of Gram's will (following her violent death at the hands of a burglar.) Liz, as the oldest, inherits Gram's land and house. She is dismayed because she doesn't particularly want to come back to Stella Maris to live, but knows that it is expected of her.

Phil Yanov shared a query letter that he intends to e-mail to the publishers of the "Outwitting" series of books. Phil's book will be entitled, "Outwitting The Media: Do It Yourself Publicity for your Business, Service, Product, or Organization." (Editor's note: See the Table Talk item above to discover the publisher's response to this query letter.)

Sarah Cureton read the second installment of her novel Breathe. Heroine Raquel is assigned the lead on a 20 million dollar project. Her friend at work, Al, was offered a position working under Raquel, but turned it down because he didn't think the friendship could handle it. The two of them go to lunch and discuss it.

Marie Newman read a poem called "Broken String". Marie's parents, as high school sweethearts who lived next door to each other, used to sleep with a string tied to their big toes and hung between their bedroom windows.

In his rewrite of the short story "Griswold", Steve Heckman changed the story to have more believability and impact. The female narrator of the story is the owner of "Caroline's Collectibles", and begins the story by buying a load of antiques from a down-trodden mother at a yard sale. While unpacking her purchases back at her store, she discovers a note from the woman's grandmother bequeathing most of the items to "someone who will appreciate the role [the items] have played in our family, the tie they give us to our past." In the end, the narrator returns the antiques, along with the letter and plates full of collards and cornbread, keeping just one item for the price she originally paid for all of them.

Finally, Carol Isler explained that she once had a class full of kids who were not very nice to an autistic child in the class. Carol assigned "The Nose-Picker Challenge" to the class, and then wrote her own submission to show how a negative attribute can be interpreted in a good way. As far as the content of the piece, well, you just had to be there.

Printed Matters is the newsletter of the Greenville Chapter, SCWW, which meets on the first Thursday and third Tuesday of each month at 6:00 p.m. at The Open Book, 110 S Pleasantburg Drive, Greenville, SC.

Thanks to our contributing writers and news reporters:
Bob Strother, Phil Yanov, Pat Stewart, Marcia Migacz, Kevin Coyle, Sarah Cureton, and John Migacz

Copyright 2005 by Marcia Migacz, Editor. Contributing writers retain all rights to their work.