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9/20/03        I have come to the Lord on a most peculiar path. I was brought up in christian surroundings, but my parents never wanted to push their beliefs on me. In the end, I am glad they didn't. I never went to church, I never really thought about it much.
        As I got older, I started thinking very scientifically minded. If it couldn't be proved, then it didn't exist. I can remember one of my friends telling me about creation, and I would say, "No, Evolution."
        I was taught the complete process of how biology says that chemicals, evolved into bacteria, which evolved blah, blah, blah, monkeys, blah, blah blah.... I understood every aspect of what was taught to me. It was very difficult to accept creation.
        One day, I was reading about wiccan beliefs (witchcraft) and I thought to myself that if this is real, then it could work for me. So I studied and practiced, and eventually it started working. It took a lot of time and effort, but it really was working. My friend and I did a ritual one day, and the wind started blowing, and it started to storm, although there was not even rain in the forecast. My friend got scared, and never went near witcraft again...he became a christian quick.
        But I was more intrigued than before. I started wanting to do more, and more. Life was getting very easy for me. If I wanted money, I just said two words, five times. I would get money out of somewhere within a day or two.
        Soon I had gotten interested in psychic feelings and then future predictions. Nostradamus, Edgar Cayce, and The Book of Revelation. My mom told me to watch some tv show that she thought I would be interested in, but it was on the christian tv station (TBN) so I was like, "No, I don't want to hear about it." She said, "Just give it a chance." By the way, I was really really tripping hard on some over-the-counter pills at the time, and had felt my mind so expanded, just taking everything in, but on a larger, more spiritual scale. Almost on the verge of an out of body experience-type trip.
        So, hopeing my mom wouldn't notice how far gone from reality I was, I sat down, and started watching the show. It was "Jack Van Impe Presesnts." This show is a news program that correlates the news around the world, and Bible prophecy. Dr. Jack Van Impe has memorized over 15,000 Bible verses, including the entire new testament, and over 7,000 verses out of the old.He is not a preacher, he is a Bible scholar. Since that day I have watched his program every week, and I encourage you to, also. It is very interesting. That night, I became a Christian, and was on a "natural high" for a long time after that.
        But I continued using drugs, not caring about anything outside of my little sphere of life. But I had planted that seed that so desperately needed and wanted to get planted. Over the past two and a half years or so, I have been nurturing that seed, and it has grown from a seed to a whole, vibrant plant, metaphorically speaking. The seed was the want to live in the light, and want for wisdom. The nurturing was reading the Bible, in fourteen different translations. Not the entire Bible; I have yet to read it from cover to cover, but I have read parts of it. I have so far read the first four books, revalation about five or six times through, parts of Daniel, Proverbs, Psalms, Isaiah, the Gospel, and many other parts. Sometimes, I will drop the Bible, or something, and as I go to pick it up, my eyes will fall on a verse and it will have great meaning in my life at that particular time.
        I eventually stopped using all the hard drugs that were going to kill me, and I have found moderation in other areas, such as alcohol and marajuana. I used to smoke as much as 21grams a day, which to non-smokers, is a lot of weed. A very expensive habit, but I never payed for any of it; it was just always supplied. But now, I am down to about two or three joints a day, which is still too much, but that is someting I am still working on. Alcohol, too.
        In terms of my mind, though, I used to think bad thoughts about everyone and judge everyone, and even try to start confrontations, but I have learned to "love thy neighbor" and now I rarly find myself thinking ill thoughts about someone. Those thoughts manifest themselves and become reality, good or bad, so why not think good thoughts about them. I believe that wishing something bad on someone else is some form of witchcraft that most people don't even know that they are doing. It is worse to think bad thoughts about someone, than to punch them in the face, in my beliefs.
        Lately, I believe God has been rewarding me for staying on the right path. I just recently asked for a lot...and he has provided everything I needed, and still is. I could not have moved away from my former "Hell Hole" if it wasn't for Him. But He has provided, and I have faith that as long as I stay on the right path, he will continue to provide for me. And I believe that whenever I quit drugs in their entirety (pot, alcohol, caffeine, ibuprofin, etc...) and acheive goals in other areas of my life, then God will shower me with abundance, but I have to stay on my path of self-betterment. Rome wasn't built in a day, but it could be torn down in a day, so this path is a long, difficult path that has many detours and run-arounds, but there is that central straight path that takes me all the way there. Let's hope we all chose our path wisely.