They kissed gently, sweetly as the rain came down around them. Donna desperately wanted to remember the moment, retain more of the experience than she had the first time around. She'd been preoccupied with their first kiss since she'd gotten over the nightmare later that night, despite the fact that they'd both agreed to forget it.

Josh had his hand on the side of her neck, and when he rubbed his thumb gently back and forth along her jaw line, she thought she would melt right there at his feet, despite the freezing cold. Both her hands had taken up residence high on his chest, and he reached up and wrapped his free, left hand around her right, where it lay near his collarbone.

She frowned a little into the kiss. His hands really were cold. Maybe they should...

She lost her train of thought completely as he began to nibble a little on her bottom lip. God, she loved that. She slid her left hand up to his shoulder and into his hair, and she felt him shudder a little when she did. She decided to let herself think that was because of her and not the weather, even though it could have easily been either.

She was just beginning to question whether she was having one of the best dreams of her life when a gust of wind blew into the face of the building, spraying them with a mist from the pouring rain. He pulled back half an inch but no further, eyes still shut, hands staying where they were. She could feel his heart pounding in his chest with her right hand, could feel his breath on her cheek as it came in pants. She looked up at him, waiting for whatever thought was in his head to find its way to his mouth.

"Dammit," he whispered finally.

She chortled softly, in spite of herself. "Here's a tip for you, Casanova. When you kiss a woman like that, the first word out of your mouth should not be—"

"I know," he moaned embarrassedly, giving her hand a little squeeze. "That wasn't...that's not what I meant." He sighed deeply, finally opening his eyes to look at her. "I really shouldn't have done that."

She nodded. "I know," she whispered. Josh looked down. "But I'm glad you did."

He looked up and gave her a dimpled grin, followed by another quick kiss. "Well, I'm glad you're glad," he said, hugging her tightly. "But I still shouldn't have."

As she returned the hug, she became suddenly aware of the index card she had crumpled in her hand at some point during the kiss. She looked at it over his shoulder, looked at the amazing things he'd written...and said. And all of a sudden, the whole thing seemed ludicrous to her. "Josh...why not?"

He pulled back and looked at her. "Why not?" he asked incredulously.

"I mean, you know, obviously," Donna said, pulling her hands back in front of her. "But...I mean if you meant...if you meant this," she smoothed the card out with her hand. "Then, you know...why not?"

He exhaled slowly. She knew the answer as well as he did. But she was trying to talk both of them out of it. "Because, Donna," he said, unable to keep the sadness from his voice.

"Because why?" The words were deceptively simple, almost childlike. But the challenge they made was complex, sophisticated, and very adult.

"Many, many reasons," he said, looking at her sadly. "Not the least of which is that we said we were gonna forget about it last time."

She nodded. "That's what we agreed."

"Yeah."

"Can I tell you something?"

"What?"

"I haven't completely honored that agreement."

He sighed again. "Me either." One corner of his mouth quirked up. "Under normal circumstances, we should be happy."

She nodded again. "I know," she said. She looked back down at the card. "So why aren't we?"

"Because," he whispered.

"Be—"

"You know why," he said. "The job. The President. The backlash. The scandal."

"You're the one who keeps saying that I'm being ridiculous about all that stuff," Donna said. "That there wouldn't be a scandal."

"What I said was that it was ridiculous to worry about a scandal when there's nothing going on," Josh said. "It's a whole different thing when the accusations that would be flying around might actually be true."

She bowed her head, running her finger across the words written on the card.

"But...these things aren't scandalous. These things aren't torrid or tawdry or illicit. These things are sweet and heartfelt and...true," she looked up at him. "Aren't they?"

"Yeah," Josh said. "But that's not gonna be how it plays, Donna. You've been right about that part all along."

She stood up straighter. "I don't care. We just said we weren't ashamed—"

"I care. And it's got nothing to do with shame," Josh said. "It's got to do with...Donna, they've been following you around all week and you've been utterly miserable. Can you imagine if we were to...were to...try to see where things lead what the reaction would be?"

"I. Don't. Care."

"Then maybe you'll care the next time a car backfires on the street and you have a panic attack and there's a camera around to capture it." Donna blinked like she'd been slapped. "Maybe you'll care when I kiss you goodnight on your doorstep and a picture of it gets published in the tabloids. Maybe you'll care when you're reduced from being the only reason I get anything done to some nameless blonde who slept her way to the top. That's what they'll say, Donna. Not all of them, not the Danny Concannons of the world. But the Stu Winkles of the world will have a field day and it will be at your expense, more than mine. I care about that."

He took a deep breath. "Also because the press is just one of the things you've got on your plate right now. You're still trying to work through some things with Stanley, and...God, I swore to myself I was gonna keep this away from you!"

He turned on his heel and kicked the railing, sending the water that was standing on the top of it flying. He ran his hand through his hair silently and watched the rain.

"Keep what away from me?"

He bowed his head, not wanting to answer.

"Josh," she stepped forward, trying to see his face over his shoulder. "Keep what away from me?"

"This," he choked out. "This whole...this. You know?" He turned and faced her again. "With everything else you've got going on, you don't need me piling on anything extra. I wasn't gonna tell you about...at least not while you were still trying to sort through the stuff from the robbery."

"This, the...appreciation?" He nodded guiltily. "Josh, how the hell long have you felt like this?"

He looked at her for a long moment. "I don't know," he said honestly. "A long time, I think. But I didn't, I don't know...allow myself to admit it until last weekend."

"LAST WEEKEND?!?!?!" she screeched. "You mean to say that you've been—-"

"Donna, shhh!" Josh flinched.

"You mean to say that you've been sitting on this for—"

"What the hell else was I supposed to do, Donna? I needed time to think! I needed time to figure out what the hell was happening to my life. I needed to figure out what I was going to say to you, if anything. I don't think you fully appreciate what a major development this is for me. It's been very disconcerting."

"Well, bless your heart," Donna said sarcastically. "You were going to keep this from me? You were actually going to keep this from me?"

"For the moment," he said. "I thought it was what was best."

"How long of a moment?" she asked quietly.

"I hadn't figured that part out yet."

Donna nodded thoughtfully. "What happened?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I think that cat's out of the bag, Josh."

"Oh." He took a deep breath. "First of all, there was the Evening of Appreciation, which somewhere along the line got a little out of control. A little...completely out of control. There was the martini, the Beaujolais, the dessert wine, the dress—"

"The dress?"

"Don't think I didn't notice. You played your role in this, too." He pointed a finger at her.

She nodded. "Fair enough."

"Not to mention that you had to spend the whole night being so damn adorable, with your Fitzgerald trivia and your thing about the veal, and how cute you are when you're tipsy. And then somewhere along the way it became 'Why Josh Is No Longer Fit to be Called a Man,'" he moaned. "And now...well, here we are."

"Here we are," Donna repeated. "What do you propose we do about it?"

He looked at his feet for a minute. "I don't suppose there's any chance you'd want to just for—"

"Don't ask me to forget it, Josh. Please don't ask me to do that. It would ruin all the things you..." She looked down at the card again. "I can't forget it. And I won't. I refuse."

"But with everything else you've got on your agenda, how can we possibly...you've got some other things to deal with, Donna. And I don't think...I can't ask you to make a decision on this right now, with your mind going in 50 different directions at once."

"Do I get any say in this at all?"

"You asked what I proposed," he said, turning and pacing with his hands on his hips.

Donna looked down at the card again. "With everything else I have on my agenda..." she mumbled to herself, then jerked her head up. "Hey, who says we've gotta decide this right now?"

"Well, if we don't decide pretty soon, we're both gonna freeze to death," Josh said, watching the rain as it dripped off of the eaves above his head.

"No, I mean...look at me for a second."

He turned to face her slowly, almost cautiously.

"What you're saying is, you don't think I can handle this...whatever you want to call it...new development...while I'm still dealing with the other stuff. The stuff from the bank."

"I'm not saying you're—"

"I'm inclined to agree," she interrupted.

"What?"

"I'm inclined to agree. And when we do decide to...to talk about this...I want to be able to give it my undivided attention," she said.

"Okay..."

"So why don't we table it? Just think about it for a little while? Talk about the possibilities, let the idea roll around in our heads. With no outside pressure whatsoever. We don't make any decisions until we both feel I'm sufficiently past my current...difficulties, but we don't pretend we never said those things, either. We take our time, we figure out the best thing to do, we take it nice and slow, and we think about it."

He just looked at her.

"We like to think, Josh."

He smiled at that, but still said nothing.

"Josh, I can't believe that if this is something we both want that...there has to be a way. Maybe it really isn't that complicated after all. Maybe it doesn't have to be all heartache and sorrow. Surely there's something more out there than that. What could it hurt to just think about it?"

He looked at her for a long moment, then took a deep breath and answered finally. "Sounds like a plan to me." His face registered surprise suddenly. "Wait a minute. Are you saying...you know...you would be interested in thinking about...that the idea of thinking about...that you would—"

"I'm saying I appreciate you, too," she said earnestly.

He closed the space between them in the blink of an eye and kissed her speechless. Her knees became jelly. She wasn't exactly sure how she stayed standing, since both of his hands were on either side of her head, but she didn't drop to the ground just the same.

Thinking. There was going to be thinking. Not running away and not 'forget I said anything' and not misdirection. Somehow, they'd kept this thing from falling apart in their hands, if only for the moment.

Josh eventually moved from her mouth to her cheek to her jaw line. "Joshua," she whispered.

"Hmm?"

"This is...not conducive to the tabling."

"I know," she felt him smile against her neck.

"Josh..."

"Donna?"

Donna had to stifle a moan as his teeth grazed her skin. "Yeah?"

"Could we please..." He planted another kiss on her neck. "For the love of God..." Back to her jaw line. "Go inside before my brain freezes over and I forget how to use a door?"

She smiled at him when he stood straight again. "That's awfully forward of you. Inviting yourself in after only—"

"No, no, no," he said, planting a tender kiss on the tip of her nose. "This is the end of the evening. We agreed."

"So...we're tabling the issue, then?"

"And thinking," he said, brushing a damp lock of hair that had fallen out of her up do behind her ear. "Because we like to think."

Donna couldn't help but smile. "'Kay. But before we do, though..." She grabbed him by the tie and pulled him against her, giving him a long kiss.

"Okay," she said, wiping a raindrop off his nose. "Now we can table it."

Josh grinned. God, how the hell was she going to resist those dimples now? "So we're tabling it now?" He gave her a peck on the lips.

"Mmm hmm," she responded.

Another little peck. "And, we're gonna stop doing this, then?"

"Right," she said. "Because it's not conducive to the—"

"Yeah," he said. He leaned in one last time, lingering just a second too long for the kiss to be considered a peck. "OK. It's tabled. Let the thinking begin." Donna extended her hand and Josh shook it, with mock seriousness. "I look forward to a productive exchange of ideas."

"I'm going inside now," Donna said before turning and opening the door.

Josh looked down at the forgotten duffels on the porch. "I'll get the bags, then?"

"Would you?" Donna asked sarcastically, already starting up the stairs.

******************

"We probably want to be careful that we don't warm up too quickly," Josh rattled on as he trudged up the stairs behind Donna. "You know, it might be like one of those science experiments with the flowers and the dry ice, and if you knock them against anything before they warm back up they'll just shatter into a million pieces."

"You'll be fine," Donna placated as she stuck her key in the deadbolt, then unlocked the doorknob.

"I disagree," he said. "I don't think I'll ever be the same again. I'm having trouble feeling my face. Or my arms below the elbow. Or my legs below the knee, actually." He dropped the bags on the floor just inside the door.

"Don't even talk to me about your legs below the knee," Donna said. "I wouldn't even know mine were still there if I couldn't see them."

She started to shrug out of her damp coat and Josh slid it off her shoulders, having already opened the coat closet.

"That's right, because someone insisted they were fine with the little scarf thing. The pashmina," Josh said. Donna unwound the pashmina from her neck and turned it over, inspecting it to see how wet it was. "Because you didn't want to ruin the look of the dress." He ran a finger from the strap of the halter neck to the curve of her shoulder. "What the hell were you trying to do to me with this dress, Don?" he said, voice low. He planted a feather-light kiss on her shoulder.

She smiled while her back was to him, but managed to have it completely stifled by the time she turned to face him. "Did you just kiss my shoulder?"

Josh worked hard to make his face the picture of innocence. "No."

"You didn't kiss my shoulder just then?"

"No! That would not be conducive to the tabling of the thing," he said emphatically.

"'Kay," she smiled, taking her coat from him and hanging it on the rod. "Take your coat off."

"You're feeling good?"

She stopped and looked at him. "I'm feeling really good."

He grinned at her. "I mean about being back home."

"Oh," she fought the blush in her cheeks as she looked around, sizing up her tiny apartment. She waited, almost expecting the panic to rise in her gut, but it never did. "You know, I do. I mean, I think I'm gonna be just fine."

"I think you are, too," Josh smiled. She reached for the larger duffel, but Josh beat her to it. If he wasn't careful she'd notice the extra bag he'd brought in. "Where do you want it?" He stood straight, pulling her attention away from the floor.

"I can get it," she said. "I was gonna put my flowers in some water."

The flowers were threaded through the handles of the smaller duffel. "I'll do it," he said. "You go get ready for bed, get dried off and everything." 

"You don't have to stay while I..."

"I thought I'd tuck you in," he said. "You know, just for tonight."

For a second he thought she was going to burst into tears for the dozenth time that night. "Okay." She took the larger duffel from him and headed toward the bedroom. He shoved his bag under the ottoman while she was gone. She returned with a large towel, which she tossed him.

"Make some coffee if you want it. There are a couple vases on the top shelf of the pantry. You know where everything is?"

"How could I not? It's obsessively organized. Go," he waved her off, and headed for the kitchen with the flowers.

Donna disappeared into the bathroom and in a few minutes he heard the shower running. He did his best to towel dry, the feeling slowly returning to his fingers and toes. He pulled a vase down, filled it with water and dropped the roses in. He started a pot of coffee, turned the thermostat up, and found himself alone with his thoughts.

He needed to sleep on what just happened. There was no way in hell that moment went as well as he thought it did. He'd kissed her again. Again. Less than a week since his little revelation that he loved Donna but that he shouldn't tell her and he'd kissed her again. And told her everything. Well, sort of told her everything. Did he actually say that he appreciated her? And she didn't punch him? Not only didn't she punch him, she seemed really happy about it. She'd even said that she appreciated him, too. Had they actually meant the same thing when they'd said it? What the hell were they even talking about anymore?

And then he'd kissed her yet again. This had been a banner night for doing things he shouldn't have done but didn't regret. And she'd said...they'd actually agreed to...they were gonna think about things. They were gonna table the issue while she recovered, but they were gonna think about things. There was going to be thinking! About him and Donna and kissing and appreciation. How the hell did he not manage to screw that moment up? No. Scratch that. He didn't want to think about how close he probably came.

"A watched pot never brews, you know," Donna said from behind him.

Josh turned around to see her inhaling over the vase of roses. "Hmm?"

"A watched pot. It never boils or brews." She stepped around him. "The coffee's finished, Josh. You were standing there watching a finished pot of coffee."

"I...find it fascinating," Josh covered. "It's a form of meditation."

Donna laughed as she poured a cup and took a sip. "Mmm. Perfect."

"Yeah."

"You haven't even tried it yet," she said.

His eyes went wide and he snapped out of his trance. "Don't need to. I make the perfect coffee. I know this about myself. I'm very self aware."

Donna snorted into her coffee mug as she walked back toward the bathroom. "I'm gonna dry my hair. Are you cold? I can try and find you something dry that will fit."

"That very nice Harvard sweatshirt you're wearing looks like it would probably fit me," Josh called.

"Things aren't that desperate yet, Josh, don't be ridiculous."

"I'm fine, I'm almost dry," he called as she headed back toward the bathroom.

"You're sure?"

"Yeah, I'm good."

*******************

She'd unpacked both duffels while Josh sat on the foot of the bed. They talked about the few things they both knew of that needed to get done at work tomorrow.

"That's it?" Donna asked as she dropped an armful of clothes from the previous week in the hamper.

"That's all I can think of," Josh said with a yawn. "You don't know of anything else?"

Donna shook her head. "Is it me or are we spending less time in the office lately?"

"It's been a weird week," Josh said, stretching his arms over his head and allowing himself to fall back to the mattress. "Things'll start getting back to normal now."

"Yeah," she said distractedly, standing in the middle of the room with her hands on her hips.

"What do you need?"

She smiled at him sheepishly. "Another chore to do to keep me from having to go to bed."

He thought the next statement out completely before he said it. He did not want to screw this up. "Are...you having second thoughts?"

She nodded, stepping toward the bed. "And third ones, and fourth ones and fifth ones." He sat up, then stood as she talked to him. "But thoughts. Just thoughts. Not...not anything stronger." She took a deep breath. "I'm gonna do this."

He reached forward and wrapped his arms around her shoulders, kissing her on the temple as he pulled her close. "I know you're gonna do this," he said. She held him tightly for a moment, seeking additional courage from the embrace.

He'd gone to get her a glass of water in case she wanted it during the night while she climbed in bed and hugged Jack so tightly that his little button eyes could've popped off. She really was exhausted, and she found herself already starting to drift, despite her nervousness, by the time Josh came back. He set the glass of water on the nightstand and sat down on her left side.

He took in her heavy eyelids and couldn't help but smile. "I don't think you're long for the waking world, there, Miss Moss," he said quietly. "Are you warm enough?"

She nodded slightly. He looked down at her clasped hands and laughed. "You planning on sleeping with your index card, there, Donna?"

"Something to remind me of you since you won't be here," she mumbled.

"That's what you've got Jack for," he said softly as he took the index card out of her hands and set it on the nightstand. He reached across her and put his left hand on her right arm above the elbow, rubbing her arm gently with his thumb. He'd learned in the last week that repetitive motion like that would put her to sleep.

"Don't throw it away," she mumbled, eyes already closed.

"I'm not."

"I wanna keep it," she mumbled again. "It's very sweet. It's the sweetest thing you ever did."

"Yeah, don't let that get around," he whispered. "It'll ruin my rep."

Donna quirked one corner of her mouth at him tiredly. "Did you plug in my nightlight?"

"I did," he ran the back of the fingers of his right hand across the back of her hand to reassure her. "And if you need anything, you call me. I'll be back in a flash."

She nodded, rolling onto her side, which Josh had come to recognize as something she did when she was about to fall asleep.

"Did you have a good day?" he whispered.

"I had a wonderful day," she said, surprising him by forcing her eyes open. "Thank you for all of it."

"You're welcome, Don." His dimples looked a mile deep in the lamplight.

"Gonna miss you," she mumbled, closing her eyes again.

"You won't have time," he whispered. "I'll be back first thing in the morning with breakfast."

A dopey grin made its way across her face. "'Kay. Josh, you'll lock up?"

"Tight as a drum," he nodded. "Don't worry about anything."

"And you'll call another cab?"

"I'll be fine, Donna," he placated.

"'Kay." He could see her slipping further and further into sleep. "Thank you for a wonderful day."

He leaned forward to give her a kiss on the cheek. That was really all he intended it to be. But at the last second, one of the few remaining conscious parts of her brain sensed his presence and she turned her face toward his, only slightly. He brushed his lips against hers and she responded with more force than he'd thought she was capable of using in her half-conscious state. He gave as good as he got and in a few seconds she'd wrapped her arms around his neck and had rolled onto her back again, pulling him with her. He ran a hand up the side of her arm and her fingers plunged back into his hair. God, he never wanted her to take them out of there.

When they finally broke apart a full minute later, he looked down at her still sleepy face and forced his smile to stay hidden for a moment. "Did you just kiss me?"

She shook her head and furrowed her brow, causing that adorable crinkle to appear over the bridge of her nose. "No."

"You're sure you didn't kiss me just then?"

"No, Josh. That would not be in line with our agreement about the tabling."

"Ahkay, just checking," he planted a light kiss on her chin. An idea struck him suddenly. "Do you have a Valentine for tomorrow?"

For a split second he thought she'd actually drifted off, until he saw her lips curl slowly into a grin. She opened her eyes. "I...have an offer."

"A good offer?" he asked as he dropped a kiss on her jaw line.

She shrugged. "Decent offer. He's employed, and, as far as I know is not an ex-con. Of course he's out with some other woman tonight, so..."

"Blow it off," Josh mumbled against her cheek. "Be mine instead."

She pretended to think about this for a minute. "What kind of Valentine's is there while certain issues are tabled?"

"Our kind," he whispered, then planted a kiss just below her ear.

She giggled at that. "Okay."

He began working his way back toward her chin until he finally pulled back and looked at her. "Ahkay," he grinned.

"But we really must be more stringent about the rules of what does and does not happen while an issue is tabled," she said, pushing him away from her gently.

"Hey, who went kissing who just then?"

"No one. I felt I needed to...review the issue before I slept on it."

"Oh, that's what that was."

"That's what that was," she'd already rolled back onto her side and closed her eyes again. She reached blindly behind her for Jack, who'd been pushed away a little earlier. Josh handed her the donkey wordlessly. She clutched him to her chest and breathed, "Good night, Joshua."

"Good night, Don." He leaned in quickly and planted a kiss on her forehead. He switched the lamp off and backed out of the room. The last sound Donna consciously remembered was the slight squeak of her bedroom door as Josh pulled it closed behind him, mixed with the pouring rain outside.