Best-Laid Plans

Chapter 2  (PG-13)

Josh entered the northwest lobby at a full swagger, and had his arms half-raised over his head in victory before he realized Donna wasn’t standing there waiting on him. Hmph. His victorious entrance had been cut short. Well, he’d just have to be louder about it when he found her in the bullpen. He had wrangled the Blue Dogs back across party lines and Phase Two was one step closer to becoming a reality for Charlie’s teachers.

He practically skipped into the bullpen, but his face dropped a little when she wasn’t at her desk. He continued into his office, tossing his backpack into one of the visitor’s chairs. Not here either, he thought.  He pulled a bright green Post-It off his computer monitor and was trying to decipher it when Sam popped his head in the door.

“How’d it go with the Blue Dogs?”

“I am the master of all I survey,” Josh replied, smiling.

“Really?” Sam asked, changing course and coming all the way in the room, approaching the desk. “Blankenship?”

“Got him,” Josh replied, his brow furrowed as he studied the Post-It again.

“You really are the master,” Sam said, his voice filled with genuine awe.

“Excuse me,” CJ said from the door. “If you two would prefer a little privacy, I’ll —”

“Hey,” Sam said, “A battle hard-fought deserves a little appreciation, and that’s what I’m all about. I’m Mr. Appreciative.”

Silence descended on the room.

“Okay, I think what I’m gonna do, is I’m just gonna start taking a minute to hear it in my head first before I —”

“Yeah,” CJ said. “Come on, Leo’s ready for us early.”

Sam started out the door and turned around to see Josh still distracted by the Post-It. “You coming?”

“Yeah,” Josh said. “What the hell does that even say?” he muttered before dropping it on his desk and following Sam out the door and toward Leo’s office.

“What was it?” Sam asked.

“Oh, a note from Donna,” Josh responded, waving back toward his office. “I take it she’s gone somewhere, something about Karen and carpool suds. Or possibly carp tonsils, I don’t know, it’s...”

“Stylistic penmanship,” Sam nodded knowingly.

“To be considered literate you have to be able to speak, read and write the language. I honestly think Donna just got the third one in under the wire,” Josh groused as they walked into Leo’s office.

“How’d it go?” Leo asked, taking his glasses off and coming to lean on the front of the desk as Toby hustled in.

“The Blue Dogs?” Josh pretended to wonder what Leo meant.

“Yeah.”

“They saw the light. Phase Two for Charlie’s teachers is gonna sail in the House,” Josh said, relishing the look of satisfaction that swept over Leo’s face.

“And you are the master of all you survey,” Leo finished knowingly.

“Yes, and in other title developments, Sam just dubbed himself Mr. Appreciative,” Josh added.

“I did not!”

“Sure you did,” CJ piped up, sliding her glasses up the bridge of her nose a little. “I was standing right there in Josh’s office when you said it.”

“You’re both traitors,” Sam pointed at the two of them, his face serious.

“What the hell does ‘Mr. Appreciative’ even mean?” Leo said, looking past Sam a little as if lost in thought. “Appreciative of what?”

“Among other things, he’s appreciative of the fact that he is an enormous freak,” Toby deadpanned from his spot at the table. “Then again, that’s not news to anyone here.”

“What are you appreciative of, Sam?” Leo pressed again, as Sam glared at Toby.

“No one in this room,” he snapped as he dropped into one of the high backed chairs.

“Did Blankenship cry like a little girl?” Leo turned back to Josh, smiling widely.

“No tears actually fell, but I swear to you, Leo, that man left the room and called his mommy,” Josh joked. Leo let out a small laugh. Josh beamed. He was back. God, it had been a good day.

“So, Josh is master of all he surveys and Sam is appreciative, although it’s still unclear of what exactly,” Leo continued to grin a little, despite himself. “CJ, what’s the press on about this afternoon?”

**********

Everyone stood frozen as it took a few seconds for the reality of the situation to sink in.

“Folks, I’m serious,” the tall one said, his voice deceptively calm and almost polite. “This will only take a little while and then we’ll be out of your hair. Now, if you’d all just step over here please, slowly.”

It took Donna a second to will her feet to listen to her brain, but they started moving eventually and she backed away from the counter toward the far wall the man indicated. The security guard moved to join her.

Oh God, oh God, oh God.

She kept backing up until she hit the wall, then stopped, staring, wide-eyed at the three. She was vaguely aware of the security guard standing to her left, but he somehow seemed very far away.

“Ma’am,” came the leader’s voice again. Donna startled and looked at him. He was talking to the teller, who, in total denial and shock over the situation, hadn’t moved at all. Her pen was still poised over Donna’s form, but her head was slowly shaking back and forth, almost willing the situation to be untrue.

“This way, please,” the leader motioned with the gun. The woman finally moved, in very wobbly steps, down from her post and toward the wall.

“How many other people are still here?” the leader asked her.

She looked at him as if she didn’t understand a word he’d said.

“How many?” he said, his voice not rising at all over the library tone he’d been using since he walked in, but increasing in ferocity all the same.

The security guard briefly looked to the ceiling, as if thinking, then cleared his throat softly, “Five,” he said. “The branch manager, two more tellers who should still be counting out their tills, and there are two loan officers in the back who haven’t left yet.”

The leader nodded courteously in his direction and offered the hint of a smile. “Thank you.” He looked at the other two. “Go.”

The other two headed off toward the offices behind the teller counter to round up the others. The leader kept his gun trained on Donna and the two bank employees.

“Now, this is gonna be a piece of cake,” he said. “Sir, if you’ll slowly slide your wallet out of your pocket and drop it on the floor.”

The security guard did so, looking considerably calmer than he had when the whole thing had started.

“Now, kick it toward me, please.”

The guard complied.

“Same thing with the belt. Slowly.” The leader’s eyes flicked to the policeman’s utility belt the guard wore. The holster was now empty, but most of the other gadgets were still in place.

The guard slowly undid the belt buckle and gently laid it on the ground. He kicked it gently toward the leader and it slid across the marble floor, the metal instruments in it making loud scraping sounds as it went.

“And miss, if you’ll just set your purse on the floor, please,” Donna had been absorbed in the scraping sound and it took her a second to realize he was talking to her.

“That’s right,” the man confirmed, polite as ever. “If you’ll just set it on the floor and kick it this way please.”

Donna took the straps of her fake Kate Spade purse and slid the bag off her shoulder. She and Carol had been so excited when they’d gotten them. Margaret had thrown a very hush-hush fake Kate Spade party one weekend, and Carol and Donna had both been lusting after the designer bags for a long time. Carol had bought a red one and had been the envy of CJ that Monday. Josh said he’d never seen a more perfectly box-shaped bag in his life and continued into his office, completely unimpressed. The straps were almost long enough to allow the purse to reach the floor when she held them in her hand, and she dropped it by her feet. She took the inside of her foot and gave the black nylon bag a push. It slid across the floor easily and stopped when it hit the toe of the leader’s shoe.

“Thank you,” he said as the remaining bank employees were herded out into the lobby and took their place beside the others on the wall, looking shaken and in utter disbelief. The leader went about collecting the men’s wallets. The women who worked there didn’t have their purses with them.

Donna continued to stare at her bag on the floor. Josh was right. It really was perfectly box-shaped. Josh. She was beginning to feel lightheaded, and her knees were about to buckle, she was sure.

“Alright folks, this is what we’re gonna do,” the leader stated as the other two took up position guarding the eight. “I want to take just a moment to clarify that yes, this is exactly what you think it is. Stop trying to convince yourselves that it’s not what it looks like. Just be assured that this is, indeed, really happening.”

Donna heard the teller beside her stifle a sob.

“As I said before, there is no need to panic. We have a plan in place, and it will be quickly and efficiently executed. Absolutely no one is going to get hurt, because we’re all going to keep cooperating just like we’ve been doing.” The leader looked up and down the line. “So if you’ll just do as we say, we’ll be out of here sooner than you can imagine, and you’ll all be home in time for dinner.”

The group just stared at him wide-eyed.

“Alright. Have a seat please.” He motioned with the gun, a semi-automatic weapon, Donna noticed for the first time, to the marble floor. God, she hated guns. She heard the others moving beside her and remembered the order. Grateful she didn’t have to keep standing anymore, she allowed her knees to fold, as they’d been wanting to, and slid down the wall to the floor.

“Not you, sir,” the leader indicated a bespectacled man near the end of the line who wore a gold nametag with “Branch Manager” under his name. “Mr. Williams,” the leader read the tag as he called the man out of line. “If you please,” he indicated the back of the bank again. The bank manager nodded and stepped slowly in the direction of the vault, followed by the shortest of the robbers, the one who’d been pretending to fill out his deposit slip so diligently. He hoisted a large bag onto his shoulder that the other one had been carrying until now.

The other, the door man, who was the biggest and strongest-looking of the bunch, kept his gun trained on the group, which was now settled on the floor. The leader adjusted the front blinds, re-checked the door, and turned off some lights in the front area of the lobby, making it look to the outside world like the bank was closing for business.

The outside world...Donna looked out the window as the last of the blinds were closed. Across the street, Karim’s place disappeared behind the horizontal slats. She felt like the whole world was falling away from her. When it started, all she could think was oh God, oh God, oh God. Now, she struggled for any thought. Any whatsoever. Everything was a complete blank; it was like her brain wasn’t functioning.

“You checked the back exit?” the leader asked the strong one professionally. The strong one nodded. “Good, we’re in business.”

“We are officially in business,” the short man declared as he followed the branch manager back out of the area. “Decryption program’s running as we speak.”

“Outstanding,” the leader smiled. God, how could he be so civil in the middle of what he was doing? “You see, folks, like I said, home in time for dinner,” the leader said as the shorter one indicated to Mr. Williams to rejoin the group.

Donna pulled her knees to her chest and stared at the pattern in the green and tan marble floor. They honestly don’t seem out to hurt us, she thought. Maybe, just maybe, they’ll get what they want and go. And this will end up being a story I tell when people start talking about dark moments in their past after a few too many beers. They’ve got a plan. If he’s telling the truth, this won’t last long, and we might just be OK. Trouble was, few things in life go according to plans, and Donna knew it.

No, she thought as she fought the sting in her eyes. It isn’t over. It isn’t nearly over.